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???2013 & Forward???

???2013 & Forward???

Instead of going away to college, I stayed at home and commuted to school to save money. At 24, I graduated college and continuted to work my college part-time job while looking for work. It took me 2.5 years to find a full-time job after college. The job is 100% unrelated to what I studied in college and does not pay enough for me to move out of my parents home and be on my own. However, I was fortunate enough to be able to purchase my first car with this job.

The holidays have made me to feel very embarrased and depressed about my situation. The rest of the people my age have already found good jobs, moved out, gotten married, and started families. Yet, I am the only one still living at home with my parents with no career, no boyfriend, and no friends. The most troubling part of it is that I am still a finacial burden to my parents. I want to pay them rent but they will not accept it. I took a bill from the mailbox and paid it for them and they were not happy to have me do that for them. I feel guilty about still living with them at nearly 27 but have nowhere else to go. 

Of course living each day with life health and strength is a big blessing. However, I am very uncertain of my future and what I should do to become more self-sufficent. I thought of returning to school to take up a trade where I might actually have a chance of getting a job but am not quite sure what I would be good at or where the money would come from. I dont want to burden my family for more years re-attending college.

My younger sister is 20 and went away to college. She returned for the holidays and my parents bought her housewares because she will be graduating soon and anticipates moving away and not moving back in with my parents. That just made me feel even worse about my situation.

I am just at a lost for what to do next. Any words of advice?

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henna-red henna-red 3 years
sorry, that's "young folk", not "you folk", unless it pertains. :)
henna-red henna-red 3 years
So long as you depend on your parents, you will not learn how to depend on yourself. A master's degree is always a good investment, so long as it's you investing in yourself, and not you depending on your parents to pay for your continuing education because you haven't developed the skill you need to support yourself, to find a better job, or a more adult, socialized lifestyle. Learning how to find a job is a skill set in itself. If you can't do it on your own, and you have an education, then why not try a head hunter? Let someone do the work that you're not being successful with. And I think that is a main part of your issue...that you haven't developed the life skills you need, including those "job search" skills, that are, admittedly, not so easy to come by. You set yourself apart. In order to advance in your career or your life, you're going to have to stop're going to have join into life. If you can afford to pay your parents rent, and pay for a car, then you can afford to live on your own, or with a roomate. And having to meet those monthly obligations is very motivational. Listen, girl, the world isn't going to automaticlly drop at your feet because you've gotten your degree. That's a great accomplishment, but it's the beginning of new challenges. And you haven't accepted those challenges. There's not reason why you can't do exactly what your sister is planning to do, and leave your parents home and stand up on your own two feet. But you have to work for that. You have to learn to depend on yourself, and not on them. There are, unfortunately, a host of young people out there today who are not working in their field of study. I don't know what you studied, but the fields that are hiring include tech and health care. I know there's a glut on the market of you folks who have studied the humanities, or liberal arts, or some socialy based career, who don't look at all into whether or not there is some kind of job available to them after graduation....or what kind and what it will take to get hired. What did you study? What are your skills? What skills are you learning in the job you're working now and how can you apply them in a career that includes some advancement? I suggest getting some help with better job search skills, a professional counselor (like the ones they have when you're in school,) and again, a headhunter. And get yourself out of your parents house, and stop depending on someone other than yourself for your financial support....let them emotionally encourage and support you, but make your own money....that's the only way you will learn actually doing it. You have life, health, and strength....add some resolve, determination, and self confidence to do and be the person you want to be. And stop comparing yourself to everyone else. This is life, not a contest or competition to see who gets the brass ring first. This is about you, your life, and what you want from it. As Oprah says, everything starts with you. good luck, and happy 2013

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