I have a best friend of seven years and I am concerned that she is not really a true friend at all. She takes advantage of me by CONSTANTLY asking for rides (and never saying thank you), she invites herself over to my house and will sprawl out on the couch and eat my food, and on occasion she will even blow me off for a date. She treats me like a total pushover when all I want to do is be nice. There are times when it’s hard for me to say “no”, but the people who have known me for a long time (like my best friend) should understand that I am a just a really kind, but at the same time, strong person.
Also, I had to break up with my boyfriend this summer and I avoided his calls for a period of time. I know it wasn’t the best way to handle it but my “best friend” literally told me I was a horrible person and that I was acting like a b*tch for ignoring him. (I couldn’t have been that mean because my ex and I remain close friends). I have always supported her even if I disagreed with her decisions. But through the whole breakup she was completely on my boyfriend’s side. (I even remember a time when she said “No offense but I don’t think he really likes you, I think he just wants a girlfriend.”)
I know it might seem obvious that I should just be done with her, but there are times when she can be really kind, and hilarious, and fun to hang out with. She is the only one of my friends who truly knows the most about me, we tell each other everything. We go out to dinner and hang out almost every other night and we share a close group of friends. And as I get older, I find it more difficult to make friends because I am very shy. I’m worried that if I give up my best friend, it will be hard to find someone else and build an entirely new relationship.
So what do I do? I have a best friend who takes our relationship for granted and considers me a huge pushover who she can walk all over and take advantage of. She can be mean at times by talking about me behind my back to our other friends, or being rude to my face, but I allow her to talk to me like that (for the most part). She should realize that I am just a nice person and a lot of the time I do enjoy giving her rides or hosting get togethers at my house, but not when these acts go totaly unappreciated. I have just invested so much time with her and we have shared some real, wonderful times together. We have been through so much and yet I there are times when I can’t stand the way she treats me. Should I let her go for good? Or should I accept that there is no such thing as a perfect best friend?
Any advice would be great!