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I was sitting here tonight,thinking about when I was younger and all the expectations I had with my life. They weren't really much, I've never been an overachiever. I did know if I ever had kids they would know they were loved, and wanted. I would find Mr.Right and we would stay married forever, I know what divorce is like for a child, it's not nice. Oh yeah, and I was going to be the coolest mom EVER!!!
Let's see, I did find Mr. Right...twice, only both times he was Mr Wrong, but I got a wonderful child from each one, so they weren't all wrong, just not all right.
I'm pretty sure my children know that I love them, I tell them enough, just not so sure they're listening, maybe it's the ipod hanging off their ears, that could have something to do with my fears.
Was I the coolest mom ever? I'd like to think so, but if I did my job right, I don't think I could have been. Raising kids today is not easy, when my daughter was in her teens I thought please just let me get her through high school without her getting pregnant, or even worse, a drug habit. I'm not one of these modern day moms that thinks being my daughters best friend, is the best thing for her. She has plenty of friends I have the cellphone bill to prove it. I was tough. No locks on her door, strict curfew, and you bet your sweet ass I read her diary, yeah theres trust, then theres actually knowing whats going on. My daughter came to me with her problems, we had a great, relationship, but I had to know for sure, of course she never knew I read her diary, my friends said it was wrong, I said, if she knows...then its wrong. My friends were both grandmothers before their daughters were out of high school.My daughter got good grades, was a joy to have around, truly, and now shes living on her own and having a good time.
My son, who has not had an easy life, has a great disposition, a wondeful sense of humor and he makes me laugh all the time. Hes 17, going to be a senior next year, he has a 3.75 gpa and hes taking AP classes (college courses), he does have a smart mouth once in a while, and while I'm letting him know that's not acceptable, I'm secretly thinking, thank god, he is a normal teen. He could be bitter and he could be down on life, but hes not.
Makes me wonder how I got so lucky? Then I think where did the time go? It does go fast and my son will be going off to college this time next year, and I'll be alone.
I thought I was going to be starting a whole new life, actually was planning on getting married and having a baby, but it didn't work out, thats what I get for dating younger men. But damn they are so nice!
Those are my kids,in the picture up there, when they were younger and now. If you have young ones, enjoy every minute,because they don't stay young forever.
Thats it, no more. I'm done rambling. I'm hungry.