Skip Nav
Katy Perry
See Katy Perry in Various States of Undress
Celebrity Pregnancies
Ciara Is Pregnant With Her Second Child
Jessica Simpson
Jessica Simpson Puts Her Best Foot Forward at a Fashion Event in NYC

Group Therapy: How do I learn to love little dogs?

My boyfriend and I were talking last night, and I alluded to the fact that when we move in together (which isn't in the near future) I would like to get a kitten. He said great! he likes cats, and dogs too. And then we were like, let's get a golden retriever, and I said, well, we need to live somewhere he can run around, so he said lets get a "toy" dog. (I am not mentioning what kind so that no one knows who i am.)

I am sorry if this upsets anyone, but, i don't like little dogs...whether it is Pomeranian, shiatsu, Maltese, whatever, i think they have been bred stupid. Whenever i am around the one his family has now, it jumps on my legs and scratches me, and then when i sit it jumps in my lap and tries to lick my face. and for the most part, little dogs that i have house sat for etc, are dirty...the whole house smells like dog, etc, and they have this completely empty look in their eyes. like, they don't get it. and none of them are trained. I H-A-T-E dog kisses near my mouth. Whenever i see dogs kiss people on the mouth, it makes me nauseous and i get one of those disgusted shivers. other than that, i love dogs, esp golden retrievers and golden doodles. however, i want to learn to love his favorite kind of dog, so that our whole family will mesh. any suggestions?

[EDITOR'S NOTE: To be involved in more GROUP THERAPY, click here]

Around The Web
Join The Conversation
barjar1122 barjar1122 9 years
adopt a mutt that needs a home, they rock!
bugness bugness 9 years
Just get a cat?? You said he sounded okay with a kitten, right? Problem solved. By the way, not all cats "ignore" their owners, and not all cats make a house smell. Talk about over-generalization. My greatest companion I've ever had was a cat that followed me everywhere and was incredibly loving. My aunt breeds chihuahuas on her farm. Some of them I can't stand, but there are ones that I adore. If you do get a dog and you don't like all of the qualities that you mentioned, you should be willing to put in the time to train them. I recommend clicker training. If you don't want to train, then don't get one.
ESPNgirl ESPNgirl 9 years
i also will vouch for miniature schnauzers - they're in the top 15 smartest breeds (I think #11?) and they usually weigh no more than 16 pounds if you pick a breeder who has smaller parents. my mini was actually a runt and she weighs only 4 pounds and is almost 5 months old. As someone else mentioned, they hardly shed and are hypoallergenic. agreed - you don't want a dog to lick your face, then train it not to! We have 2 minis (my boyfriend and i each got one) and the boy hardly ever wants to sit in the lap except when it's a really young pup. He's 11 pounds at 3 1/2 months. If you don't like small dogs, then don't do it. Find a compromise to get a bigger dog or go for the cat.
onesong onesong 9 years
my booker is a small dog--not a toy, but about 16 lbs. my boyfriend refers to him as a "jumbo shrimp", lol. he is not THE smartest dog i've ever seen, but he's pretty clever and totally not yappy or obnoxious...he's also got the sweetest, most loving temperament, and only gives you face kisses if you specifically say "kisses." you need to realize that dogs will behave according to their temperaments, yes, but also according to how you train them. if you train it to be a spoiled obnoxious ratdog, it will be. if you train it precisely how you would train a bigger dog (aka, not allowed on the furniture, no face licking, no yapping, et cetera) then that's how it will behave. i think that you should a) stop worrying about this for now, it is not the end-all situation of the world, and b) stop assuming that all small dogs are obnoxious (you're just wrong, they're not, and there are plenty of obnoxious larger dogs in this world) and c) educate yourself on how much work and what an expense getting a dog is (it's a LOT--up early for walks, straight home for walks, finding a place for them to stay if you go away for the weekend, shots and neutering/spaying, crate training/potty training them, the "teenage years" where they push limits and you have to be vigilant with them...there is a LOT!!). I'm not saying it's not rewarding--it surely is--but it's a significant lifestyle change and you should be prepared!
gossipqueen gossipqueen 9 years
You sound like you hate dogs...DON'T GET ONE...don't get one at all! I'm surprised at all the generalization here and plain out ignorance..but to each its own!
mlen mlen 9 years
hahaha this sounds like it was written by me- i can't stand little dogs!! my friend just got a yorkie- and her bf went along with it cause he just wanted a dog in general! is that the case with your bf? is he just desperate for a dog? in that case- there are some decent medium sized dogs that you could have- you just need to make an extra effort with them to bring them to the park and for walks and for more exercise! beagles are good well behaved dogs that don't get too huge but don't have the attributes attributed to small dogs. same with basset hounds or boxers. two of my friends had boxers and they were extremely well behaved. the only smaller dog i ever liked was a cocker spaniel- a friend of mine in highschool had one- it was playful and lovable- like a small golden retriever. cause i'm with you-- golden's are my favorite!!
Pink81406 Pink81406 9 years
I have small dogs and big dogs. My small dog is actually smarter than my big dogs, probably because I always talked to him like he could understand me, so he picked up on it. But there are some big dogs that are meant to be inside and they don't shed, such as dobermans, try and it will tell you everything you need to know about the kind of dog your looking at. And not all toy dogs are hyper and certainly not stupid, it is all in how you raise them. But I agree that it sounds like you don't need a pet. All pets are work... maybe you should try fish.
cravinsugar cravinsugar 9 years
Schar: I disagree. My parents have 3 cats...I dont' live with them, but when i visit I wouldn't know they had cats unless I saw them...their house smells wonderful. Goes back to what someone said earlier about the person owning the pets cleaning...not the pets themselves. also, to address the little dog problem, it sounds like you love dogs but have had bad experiences with miniatures. Do what everyone else has some research, go get around some well trained dogs...and don't let anyone make you feel bad about not liking getting licked on the face...that doesn't make you a bad person.
schar schar 9 years
You DO NOT love dogs. Dogs get excited to see you and like to give you affection. If that makes you shiver then you don't like them. Stick with the cat that will ignore you and not kiss you...who will BTW make your house smell a whole lot worse than even the smelliest dog could. And I agree with above commentors that dogs are a full time job. Especially if you get a high energy breed (which most small dogs are).
VanillaSilje VanillaSilje 9 years
I work as a dog trainer, and maybe I can get you some advice on this one. First things first; toy dogs are not stupid, owners who doesn't train them properly are stupid! You can use a toy dog for freestyle,obedience, agility-yeah, pretty much all the cool stuff you can do with a larger breed. I recommend freestyle- dancing with your dog! Such a fun way to compete! And second: if you don't like your dog, it will notice! So if you already know you can't love it, don't get one.
KClark05 KClark05 9 years
Wow, who knew I'd be able to share my dog searching experience on sugar! Well I was in your situation, sort of. I really wanted a dog when my boyfriend and I moved in together. However, I love the small snuggly ones. But anyways, I researched like crazy and one of my favorite sites is: The particular site I linked to lets you narrow your choices down to help you pick a breed that's right for you. It's really in depth and a great resource to use. The is another great place as mentioned above. Long story short though- I got a cat. Dogs are a lot of time and effort(worth it), but unless you have the available time to train them not to do those things, any dog you get is going to want to kiss you and be right where you are, particularly in your lap and jump like crazy on you when you get home because they are so excited to see you. Also- Adopting is an excellent option. The shelters in my area have a system where you can fill out your information and what kind of pet you are looking for/ compatible with and they will notify you if an animal matches you when/if it comes to the shelter. Good luck finding a companion!
legs legs 9 years
I was always partial to big dogs as well, but being in a small apartment I knew it wouldn't be fair to myself or the dog to get something that needed a backyard to run around in. I still wanted the sociability of a dog instead of a cat, so I got a Maltese-Poodle mix since I knew they were supposed to be on the more intelligent side, as well as hypo-allergenic. I have to say he is the greatest dog! He has the most adorable personality, was very easy to housetrain, not bark, and if there's any other stuff he pulls that I'm not okay with, it only takes a few instances of saying "No!" to get him to remember not to do it. Having a small dog is a lot easier for someone who lives in a small apartment, has responsibilities to a job and a social life, but also likes to have an animal around. If it's a small enough dog, having a pee pad isn't gross. You just need one or two around the apartment, in areas that are off to the side, and putting a new one down every day completely eliminates any odors or "gross" feelings. They also get along really well with bigger dogs (as long as the bigger ones don't play too aggressively), in the instance where you may want to get that bigger dog later on down the road. I really recommend that you do more research on small breeds and find one that corrects the misconceptions you have about toy dogs - most will surprise you!
popgoestheworld popgoestheworld 9 years
You should get a pug. They are great city dogs, pretty small, and aren't like those little yippy things that would drive any sane person bonkers.
designergirl designergirl 9 years
If you don't like little dogs at all, don't get one. Dogs are a lot of work and require training. I'm sure your boyfriend would understand if you let him know how much you dislike little dogs. Go for the kitten instead.
Megg21 Megg21 9 years
I agree completely with whoever said you are getting ahead of yourself here. I also agree that it is a MASSIVE generalization to think this of small dogs. In fact, poodles are ranked behind golden retrievers as the smartest dogs. Many toy breeds in fact are well suited to training. I have a toy poodle and she is one of the smartest dogs I've ever met. She's litter boxed trained like a cat (she also cleans her paws like a cat), when her food bag is empty we ask her to pick it up and carry it to where we refill it, she follows all basic commands and has the biggest heart. As others said, it's how you RAISE the dog. All breeds have certain characteristics but you can raise them to overcome almost all of them. A pitbull isn't an inherantly mean dog and a toy breed isn't inherantly stupid. A bit of training and affection go a long way.
nicachica nicachica 9 years
it sounds like you're getting ahead of yourself here! if you're not even close to moving in with your boyfriend, then why are you stressing so much over a very big hypothetical situation? sounds like you just needed to vent about your annoyance with small dogs....
NdHebert NdHebert 9 years
You think its nasty when a dog licks its owners face? Want to know how to solve this? Dont let it lick your face!!!
fancybeth fancybeth 9 years
Miniature schnauzers are small, but super smart and loving-- like a big dog in a small dog's body. They are very easy to train. I always had big dogs until I got my little schnauzer. All the small breeds are different, but I agree that it sounds like a training problem.
HellooQueen HellooQueen 9 years
Why get one then? Don't get a pet you're not going to love! Big dogs jump on people and lick people as much as little dogs! The difference is that most people dont mind or train their little dog not to do that. I have toy pomeranian that is so sweet and behaved. I also have two terriers, but have had big dogs in the past. I love little dogs. Perhaps you should get a small terrier, like a rat terrier. They come in three sizes, the toy being the smallest. You need to research breeds. If you dont like small dogs, dont get one!
pinupsweetheart pinupsweetheart 9 years
It sounds like you have not been around dogs that have been trained. I think that is where your problem is. Dogs of any size should not be allowed to jump on your, scratch your legs or jump on your lap without permission. I have always had small dogs (under 15 pounds.) From Miniature Schnauzers to a West Highland White Terrier to my now dog Bella, a half Chihuahua half Dachshund stray I found on Thanksgiving night in a four lane highway. Recently we just lost our 15 year old Schipperke. He was the smartest dog I have ever come across. He knew over 25 different toys each by name, could wave hello/goodbye, and knew what time to eat on the dot – even during daylight savings. He never knew his own size. He would act like a Great Dane in a little body. He would protect my mom and me with his life. Rather than pass off all small dogs as stupid and meaningless, try looking into different breeds. There are many breeds out there that are known to be intelligent dogs. Picking a breed to dog to add to your family is a huge responsibility. Large or small. You must make sure the dog is compatible with your personality and lifestyle. You must be sure the dog gets along with other animals as well as children. For instance, if you do not like a hyper dog, a Jack Russell Terrier known for its high spirit and energy may not be for you. You may be interested in a Bulldog that is known to be strong as well as having a kind non-aggressive demeanor. Check out the AKC website for breed information. Take your time in choosing a dog. I am sure with careful research between you and your guy; you can find a compromise for the both of you. P.S Don’t forget dog training!
kiddylnd kiddylnd 9 years
WOW. Talk about generalization. Not ALL small dogs behave in the manner in which you speak, and in fact a fair amount of large dogs do the same. It depends on how the animal was bred (purebreds by definition are inbred) and what charateristics they have. It also depends on the OWNER to train said pet. A dog who jumps into the lap upon the command of 'sit' is NOT trained to sit. DUH. As for the homes of these people, well that's just the cleanliness of the owners themselves. No matter what kind of pet you have, you need to bathe it and clean and vacuum your home. Pet dander and dust from paws and wet dog smell does not have to be a part of anyone's life if they clean. I don't really get why you want a dog in the first place. From the end of your post it doesn't even sound like you really love dogs at all. Don't get a dog if you don't love them. If you really want a dog, research breeds and find some that you like the characteristics of. Then head to your local Animal Shelter and find a dog that fits into your lifestyle and expectations. Not every dog that you WANT will fit with your lifestyle - some dogs can be left alone while you are at work, some can't. Some dogs require more exercise than others. There's also making sure that you keep them socialized so as not to have any problems with aggression as they mature. Getting a dog should require just as much thought and planning as having kids. Like - what happens IF you and your SO split? Who gets the dog then? What happens if the dog gets bigger than you expected? Who will take care of it when you are away? It sounds like you BOTH have a lot more to think about than if you get a Teacup Chihuahua or a Labrador. Oh, and if you want a labradoodle, keep in mind that this is a MIXED BREED DOG, not a purebred and you could just as easily get a Lab Mix at a shelter. Last tidbit - Shiatsu is deep pressure massage. Shih Tzu is a dog. Sorry, that was just bugging me.
Tamma1387 Tamma1387 9 years
I do have to admit though, I dig boston terriers(annabelle is adorable Fab!) and pugs. Maybe its just cuz they have a bigger dog look?
priceless priceless 9 years
Go to the human society its the best place. You wont end up with a toy and you will be giving a great dog a home. I am a big fan I have adopted two great dogs over my life and neither was a purebred, but both were perfect.
Fashion Fashion 9 years
All you need is to meet Annabelle! xo
cubadog cubadog 9 years
You don't have to get a toy breed there are lots of other small dogs that make great pets. While you have a right to your opinion.. I don't know where you got your facts but not all small dogs are stupid that's like saying all labs are stupid because they have been so over-bred. I think my favorite line is that all small dog owners have smelly houses. Do some research about different breeds there are some large breed dogs that are lazy and don't need that much exercise. When I got my dog I did a lot of research and found a dog that is perfect for my lifestyle. I have a mini dachshund that is incredibly smart and very stubborn but like any dog if you invest time in the training you'll get through the chewing, house breaking stage if you decide to get a puppy. Just remember to stay away from pet stores and puppy mills. When you find a breeder make sure you take the time to go visit the breeder a couple of times before picking out your puppy.

POPSUGAR, the #1 independent media and technology company for women. Where more than 75 million women go for original, inspirational content that feeds their passions and interests.

From Our Partners
Latest Celebrity & Entertainment
All the Latest From Ryan Reynolds