Oh, 90210. You are so perplexing. On the one hand, I see sure signs of improvement, but on the other, it feels like each week makes less and less sense. It's also difficult to figure out whom I want to root for, you know? Annie is our good girl from Kansas trying to navigate the treacherous waters of the super rich, but week in and week out, I have a terribly difficult time sympathizing with her.
At least Naomi is so bad she's good. This week, her evilness is on full display, and I'd like to send a clear message to the writers: Thank you! Her scheming saves this episode. A lot goes down at Annie's sweet 16 party, including Tabitha on the mic, so let's not waste time — just read more.
- Well, you knew Annie's lying about her relationship with Ethan was bound to catch up with her sooner or later, and this episode is the time! After Naomi catches them making out in the classroom, she doesn't get mad — she gets even and comes up with a highly complicated revenge scheme.
- Silver knows her former BFF well enough to warn Annie about lying to Naomi: "If she finds out from some random, it ain't gonna be pretty."
- Right off the bat, too, we learn that the whole school is abuzz with Ryan's suspension (Silver blogs about it with the headline "Matthews dips in the kiddie pool"). Kelly's back, and Silver tries to explain that Ryan was caught with a student, saying, "You missed some stuff while you were gone."
- Kelly's pretty brief about how her trip to see Dylan went: "Nothing’s changed. Same cheekbones, same sideburns, same perfectly messy hair, same commitment issues."
- It was hard to tell if Naomi wanted to fly Annie's Kansas ex-boyfriend, Jason, out to California to make out with him or to cause problems between Annie and Ethan. Maybe both? Either way, his slow-motion emergence from the pool was pretty hilarious (Tabitha: "You could crush mint on those abs").
- I liked the actor who played Jason. At times I thought him hotter than Ethan — you?
- When Annie, surprised, asks him what he's doing at her house, Jason responds, "I was hoping to meet Lauren Conrad. Are these the right hills?" That line just felt . . . odd.
- What did you think of that family scene at Navid's house? It felt totally surreal to me. Also, those are the people who are wealthy because of porn. So hard to reconcile!
- This episode's music is strange. There are these funny instrumentals between scenes that I found jarring. And why do Dixon and Silver karaoke "When the Saints Go Marching In"? I just don't get why teenagers would choose to sing a mid-20th-century tune when they could have busted out Rhianna or something.
- High point: Tabitha singing "Hit Me With Your Best Shot."
- Things get good toward the end, when Naomi sees Ethan and Annie kissing again and lures Jason into a make-out session. When Annie catches them, she calls Naomi manipulative and cruel and Naomi screams, "Before you moved here, my life was perfectly fine!"
- Then a dude shows up claiming to be the son of Harry and Tracy! And he's in uniform! Very intriguing.
What did you guys think of last night? Sound off!
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Photos courtesy of The CW