This week on 90210 Ethan and Annie are so in love. How do we know this? Because that's all they say to each other the entire episode (whenever they're not making out, of course). I feel like we're supposed to think of Annie and Ethan as the Dan and Serena (or Brenda and Dylan!) of the show but, in my opinion, they have zero chemistry together and are awfully PG. What do you think? Am I being too hard on these two?
Ethan and Annie are alone in their shmoopiness, though, as love is on the rocks for just about everyone else on the show, including Dixon and Silver. Oh, and Tabitha is probably leaving the show for a while! Boo. (Though we will get a little jolt of new blood when Diablo Cody guest stars!) Ready to chat? Just
- The TV world actually reflects real life in this episode as Annie watches the Midwest get battered with snow ("My friends back home are so gonna get a snow day, those lucky bastards") and a heatwave takes over L.A. She's noting this weather news as she talks to Ethan on the land line and right when she tells him she's wearing black lingerie
Aunt BeckyDebbie hops on the line to tell them to hang up (Ethan: "Charge your cell phone next time Annie").
- Aw, Tabitha rehearsing with her grandkids for her TV miniseries involving muskets and such was a cute moment on the show. I love when she declares, "I'm just not sure I'm plausible as a grandmother!"
- Which brings me to the little side plot between Tabitha and Debbie: Tabitha wants to mother the kids and does an awesome job by buying them cars and giving them the keys to her Palm Springs luxury pad. Oh! And she declares that chores are lame and she's hired people to do that stuff.
- So, Debbie gets kind of mean and tries to keep Dixon and Annie from enjoying any of this. She's at her preachiest when she forbids the kids from using the car Tabitha purchased for them ("No 16-year-old needs a car. There are 16-year-olds in other countries without shoes!").
- At school everyone is noticing how hot it is and Silver thinks it's global warming which in her mind is the end of the world. She points to Annie and Ethan's disgusting PDA as a sign of the apocalypse, which is funny. Also, is it just me or is Silver really super moody this episode?
- Navid is back and telling the secretly preggers Adrianna that he's so happy and doesn't want things to ever change. Poor, naive soul doesn't realize his dream girl got knocked up in rehab by a guy named Hank.
- Actually, Adrianna tells Naomi she thinks the baby is Hank's but she doesn't really know. Which, I'm sorry, how long was she in rehab? It felt like a minute to me but clearly there was time to sleep with enough guys to not totally be certain who the baby's father is. OMG!
- One of my favorite moments of the night is when principal Harry beams himself into the cafeteria to announce school is canceled due to the heat wave the next day. And then everyone starts chanting "Beach party! Beach party!" Maybe I'm feeling a little too cool for school but did that chanting strike anyone else as kind of lame/geeky? I'm really starting to relate to Silver actually. I'd be moody, too, if my classmates chanted stuff like that.
- Ew, when Debbie and Harry have a fight regarding Tabitha he gets them backwards and yells, "You are my mother, she is my wife!"
- So, call me crazy but I think Ethan and Annie's banter about "Going to Palm Springs" and "I think I'm ready for Palm Springs" was a euphemism for "Let's have sex." But I dunno maybe I'm reading too much into that one. (Sorry, a lil' sarcasm there.)
- Oh my gosh, but their actual almost-sex-scene is kind of amazing. First Annie says totally unsexy things in the heat of the moment including, "Today I'm a virgin and tomorrow I won't be!" followed by something about if we have sex that means we'll be together forever, right?
- At first I was impressed that the "together forever" stuff didn't turn Ethan off. But then it did. And I can't blame the guy! Annie practically asks him to commit to her for life when they don't even have diplomas yet. One step at a time girlfriend, one step at a time.
- And then poor, poor Dixon totally strikes out with Silver! He builds up the nerve to tell her he loves her and she returns his declaration with the dreaded, "Thank you." Ouch. I can see why he was so hurt.
- After Debbie and Harry realize their daughter isn't doing it with her boyfriend in Palm Springs, they decide to do it in the minivan.
- Finally, Navid totally ditches Adrianna! On the one hand, I feel like that's mean but on the other hand, it's pretty heavy stuff for a teenager to handle. She's got Naomi though and they're pretty cute together.
How are you doing with this show? Hanging in there? Think it's getting any better?
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Photos courtesy of The CW