This week on American Horror Story, we're treated to the usual revolting moments, plus someone's severed head in a box. I know what you're thinking: again? Yes, again. There's some weird stuff going on at the superreligious neighbor's house, Spalding is back (sort of), and Kyle is really improving on his vocabulary. He's not just throwing stuff at walls anymore, so that's a win. "The Sacred Taking" starts out slowly but builds up to some great moments.
The coven is realizing they have more than one enemy, and hope is on the horizon that they might actually be able to come together in order to defeat the outsiders. Thank goodness, because I really can't take more of this petty intracoven squabbling. Let's take a trip through the episode's most twisted moments, starting with that enema. I'm getting into it when you keep reading.
- Joan gives Luke a Clorox enema. Say what? Joan is fed up with her son cavorting around the neighborhood and decides he needs a good cleaning "from the inside out." So she does what every loving, God-fearing mother would: she makes him strip down and gives him a good old-fashioned enema using hot water and powdered soap from the bathroom cabinet. How warped is their family that he just accepts that as a proper punishment? And why is this season so heavy on twisted mother-son relationships?
- Fiona commits suicide. We all knew that wouldn't last, right? Fiona is losing her mind (and her hair) due to her cancer, and after a series of contrived "hallucinations" orchestrated by her vengeful coven, Fiona swallows a handful of pills. Dead guy Spalding greets her on the other side and gives her a magic potion that allows her to throw up the pills (how does he acquire that, by the way?), and she's back in action. It seems like she and Cordelia might even be on the mend!
- A sniper shoots Joan and Luke dead. Enter the witch hunter. Nan goes into the neighbor's house and finds Luke bound and gagged in a closet after his backdoor enema. The two have an altercation with Joan, and suddenly, a sniper shoots through the widow, nailing Joan and her son. Don't worry — Misty brings Joan back from the dead, and then Misty promptly falls down, presumably in shock from the energy that just got sucked from her body. Is Paul the sniper, or is it a comrade we haven't met yet? And is it the same hunter who tries to kill Misty in the beginning of the episode?
- Nan might be the new Supreme. Cordelia is convinced that Misty is the next Supreme, but a moment with Nan suggests otherwise. While mourning over Luke's dead body, Nan begs, "Don't leave me. I'm your Supreme." Hold up — does she mean she's the coven's new Supreme or she's Luke's new Supreme? I require clarification.
- Marie beheads Madame LaLaurie. Madame LaLaurie has been wasting away in a cage courtesy of her hostess, Marie Laveau. Queenie's feeling a little guilty for turning Madame over to the voodoo queen, so she brings her a fast-food burger. Madame scarfs it down and then promptly asks her a ridiculous question: "Whatever did I do to deserve this betrayal?" Is that a joke? Lady, you're one of the worst people in history. Marie is sick of keeping her in the back of her salon, so she chops of Madame's hand. She may not be able to die, but she can definitely feel that pain. Later, a box arrives at Miss Robichaux's. What could it be? It's Madame's head, still totally alive, though missing her vocal chords and only able to whisper, "Heeeelp meeee." Yuck, no way.
Other notes: Kyle loves Zoe, and Madison is superpissed. Someone uses the phrase "a tingle of the cooch," and that's really gross. Donovan's "Season of the Witch" plays, and it is awesome. What did you love or hate about this episode?