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Gossip Girl Recap: Episode 16, "You’ve Got Yale!"

Gossip Girl Rundown: Episode 16, "You’ve Got Yale!"

Anytime Yale and/or the particulars of who legally is in charge of Bart Bass's company are central to the plot of a Gossip Girl episode, you know things are going to get really nonsensical, really fast. This week's episode involves both, and I tried to turn my brain off and just go with the flow because nothing in the real world works the way this show wants it to! Yale giveth and taketh away admission with a text message and a phone call. A quick signature on a legal document, and boom! Power changes hands in an instant. It's hilarious, and everything I've come to expect from this show.

Anyway, Blair is back to being her evil, scheming self, and Chuck too seems to have returned to normal with his drunken ledge-walking days firmly behind him. Let's talk about it — just

.

  • Is Eleanor on her honeymoon or something? I miss her and Cyrus. Blair's dad and partner fill in and surprise Blair with a puppy named "Handsome Dan!" Ha! Blair's all, "Um, let's stick with just handsome."
  • Everyone in the Waldorf household is a little premature with the getting-into-Yale celebration. Blair is so smug, she even has to rag on the Gilmore Girls: "I am so a better fit for Yale than that Rory." She did not just go there!
  • Meanwhile, Rufus and Lily are full-on sleeping over at each other's places, and it's getting really weird and icky for Dan and Serena. Eric's reaction to their PDA is the best, though: "I would say get a room, but yours is right above mine. Please try to remember that."
  • Then there's Jack and Chuck. Jack's now in charge of the company and the stocks are dipping (or something) because he's still learning the ropes, or so he says. Chuck has been trying to undermine him with little pranks like sticking coke in his gym bag and sending transsexual prostitutes after him — because that's how you take control of a huge company.
  • Chuck wises up and recruits Lily, who is still very hopeful Chuck will come and live with her and the kids. I love Chuck's list of ideas to get Jack out of the company that Lily discourages: "Number 26: Crash Jack in plane."
  • Also, there's now a new teacher, Rachel, who Dan remarks about a billion times looks so young ("Does she have Benjamin Button syndrome?"). Har.
  • This teacher starts out all wholesome and Midwest and stuff but ends up getting tangled up in Blair's whacked-out web. Blair desires to teach her after she gives Blair a "B" on a paper: "Second-semester seniors get a free pass, like pregnant ladies or 14-year-old Chinese gymnasts."
  • Meanwhile, Serena gets into Yale but doesn't tell Blair for fear of her wrath (Dan: "Death by Dorota") because Blair's waitlisted. It's probably a good call because Blair's determined to ruin the person who got in instead of her ("Witch hunts are my Valium, Serena. I'm just trying to stay calm").
  • Serena basically gives up Yale because she'd rather go to Brown and thinks Yale might want her for budding-socialite reasons — and immediately Yale calls Blair to let her know she is now in. Because that's how college admission works.
  • Back to the teacher: The low grade gets this poor teacher on Blair's you-know-what list, which leads to a funny angel vs. devil scene on Blair's bed, followed by a lot of evil laughter.
  • Blair proceeds to pull the least evil prank ever (ditching Rachel at a restaurant, really?) but still feels bad and goes to apologize ("I can't not act out against people"). It's not enough, though: Rachel gives Blair detention and then she goes to hit on see Dan in Brooklyn.
  • And then Chuck saves Lily from Jack! Lily is so brave! Chuck is super cute when he's valiant!

So. Was Dan a total baby about Serena's college decision? Do you think Nate and Vanessa are boring or a nice little normal break from the rest of the madness? Do you like Rufus with Lily together? Are you emotionally prepared for Blair to go "black ops?"

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Photos courtesy of The CW

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prblms4loki prblms4loki 7 years
So NOT prepared for Blair going black ops, but very very excited for it.hahaha nice to have no bs Blair back.
prblms4loki prblms4loki 7 years
So NOT prepared for Blair going black ops, but very very excited for it. hahaha nice to have no bs Blair back.
rivrchild rivrchild 7 years
Pumachik - I don't get the connection to new teacher and Georgina that you're hinting at, but I'm intrigued. Please explain? :)
Pop-Champagne Pop-Champagne 7 years
haha I liked it. It's one of the better epsoides this season :)
reesiekitty reesiekitty 7 years
Lol- I actually loved the entire totally non-reality of this episode. The Chuck and Lily team-up definitely stole the show ( "transsexual hookers?" "They owed me a favor") and Eric with Opera For Dummies were the best. I love seeing Blair's two dads and Dorota and the bulldog, but the whole Yale thing was beyond silly. I was glad when Serena finally manned up ( so to speak) and decided to go to Brown. Lol, and her boobs got to go to the opera! Seriously, even my 9 year old son walked through the room and started giggling and said " Her dress is really tight!" that's just sad. ( I did send him out of the room again- don't put me on Megan's List!) But hey- maybe Chuck should put the new teacher on it! I mean, ok, she's all lost in the big city and looks younger than most of the cast members, but icky icky. Actually liked Jenny acting like a teen again. Didn't care about Jack anyway, but Lilkim, it did seem weird that they just didn't resolve the New Year's question at all. Totally on belly-watch for Lily now, too. But I sort of liked it that Lily is back to not caring what the social snobs care about her- I'm pretty sure the board can't take away her 20% of Bass Industries just because she starts dating a tad too soon after Bart died. But they could be a little less cozy around the grossed out children. I also feel another Dan/Serena breakup coming on.
fakeplanettelex fakeplanettelex 7 years
- the new teacher: i smell georgina. because all of a sudden you're bff with the headmistress calling her on off hours crying about a student giving you a hard time- nate & v: BOOOORING; however i am glad to see nate finally be "happy" for once- eric: um, did you not forget his awesomegayness of opera 101 for rufus?! i love that kid!!!!- dan: whiny little boy. qyb, seriously. - serena: no comment.- angel vs. devil: FANTASTIC. - penelope: ummm, did everyone just forget her unleashing the wrath of s' personal life? there were no consequences of that?- dorota: HOW AWESOME WAS HER YALE OUTFIT!!! not to mention when blair goes "black ops," dorota has the look of fear in her eyes and knows it's war?! - rufus & lily: i kinda do like them together (a lot more than s & dan) and i think they're setting up dan and the new teacher so r&l can be together. who knows at this point
fakeplanettelex fakeplanettelex 7 years
- the new teacher: i smell georgina. because all of a sudden you're bff with the headmistress calling her on off hours crying about a student giving you a hard time - nate & v: BOOOORING; however i am glad to see nate finally be "happy" for once - eric: um, did you not forget his awesomegayness of opera 101 for rufus?! i love that kid!!!! - dan: whiny little boy. qyb, seriously. - serena: no comment. - angel vs. devil: FANTASTIC. - penelope: ummm, did everyone just forget her unleashing the wrath of s' personal life? there were no consequences of that? - dorota: HOW AWESOME WAS HER YALE OUTFIT!!! not to mention when blair goes "black ops," dorota has the look of fear in her eyes and knows it's war?! - rufus & lily: i kinda do like them together (a lot more than s & dan) and i think they're setting up dan and the new teacher so r&l can be together. who knows at this point
LOVErickii LOVErickii 7 years
this episode was great and make sme excited for the next one :DD i really don't see the use of nate & vanessa they have no real use by breaks between drama, which is the best part of the show!!!
LOVErickii LOVErickii 7 years
this episode was great and make sme excited for the next one :DDi really don't see the use of nate & vanessa they have no real use by breaks between drama, which is the best part of the show!!!
lilkimbo lilkimbo 7 years
Did anyone else find it strange that the whole Blair/Uncle Jack/New Year's Eve thing was never resolved? Or did I just miss it?
cibele cibele 7 years
I didn't like this episode. But i didn't like the other Yale episode. Blair and Chuck, like usually, are the best thing about this show.And Nate and Vanessa are boring.
cibele cibele 7 years
I didn't like this episode. But i didn't like the other Yale episode. Blair and Chuck, like usually, are the best thing about this show. And Nate and Vanessa are boring.
cwitt cwitt 7 years
Good episode last night! Did anyone else catch the scene where Chuck was at the bar at the opera and Blair went running by in her orange dress behind him to go find the creepy teacher? All he did was glance over his shoulder and continue on like Blair running by in a bright orange dress happens everyday. Thought that was funny.
cwitt cwitt 7 years
Good episode last night! Did anyone else catch the scene where Chuck was at the bar at the opera and Blair went running by in her orange dress behind him to go find the creepy teacher? All he did was glance over his shoulder and continue on like Blair running by in a bright orange dress happens everyday. Thought that was funny.
LuvLeoDiCaprio LuvLeoDiCaprio 7 years
SKiwi I will miss Jack because he was sooo hot, they made him to eveil to fast. Should have built up to it... evil or not he was good to look at. Now everytime I look at Chuck I can't help but thinking he's a Brit with a hot accent, I would love to hear him talk sans American accent.
genesisrocks genesisrocks 7 years
Just wanted to add one more thing: if you apply early decision to college you have to go if they accept you unless you have a financial reason why you can't. You can't just drop out like Serena.
redchick152 redchick152 7 years
Jack was hot...i was kinda hoping for a little more of him vs chuck action, but i do think that his exit was great. i liked seeing chuck scheme w/ lilly. yay for chuck!serena-thank god she finally spoke up and did something that doesn't involve dan. it took her awhile, but she finally did it. dan annoyed me this episode!
redchick152 redchick152 7 years
Jack was hot...i was kinda hoping for a little more of him vs chuck action, but i do think that his exit was great. i liked seeing chuck scheme w/ lilly. yay for chuck! serena-thank god she finally spoke up and did something that doesn't involve dan. it took her awhile, but she finally did it. dan annoyed me this episode!
redchick152 redchick152 7 years
Jack was hot...i was kinda hoping for a little more of him vs chuck action, but i do think that his exit was great. i liked seeing chuck scheme w/ lilly. yay for chuck! serena-thank god she finally spoke up and did something that doesn't involve dan. it took her awhile, but she finally did it. dan annoyed me this episode!
Papaver Papaver 7 years
skiwi, I'm going to miss him a lot.and I'm still pissed that after 2 hilarious episodes of Mr Harrington we got one of the lamest exits ever.I'm seriously disgusted.
Papaver Papaver 7 years
skiwi, I'm going to miss him a lot. and I'm still pissed that after 2 hilarious episodes of Mr Harrington we got one of the lamest exits ever. I'm seriously disgusted.
runningesq runningesq 7 years
skiwi - it's a list of convicted sex offenders.
skiwi skiwi 7 years
3 Questions:1. Did anyone else think that Jack and Lily were just gonna start MAKING OUT in the powder room? I mistakenly thought there was some sexual tension in that scene :P!2. What is "Megan's List"?3. I might be alone on this one, but is anyone else going to miss Uncle Jack?! haha he was so evil but SO hot
skiwi skiwi 7 years
3 Questions: 1. Did anyone else think that Jack and Lily were just gonna start MAKING OUT in the powder room? I mistakenly thought there was some sexual tension in that scene :P! 2. What is "Megan's List"? 3. I might be alone on this one, but is anyone else going to miss Uncle Jack?! haha he was so evil but SO hot
tinzy tinzy 7 years
This was one of my favourite episodes in a long time. So many good scenes. In addition to those mentioned, the "opera prepping"-scene with Rufus holding Opera for Dummies was also quite funny :P The only thing I really dislike though is Nate and Vanessa... I think it'd be way more interesting if they'd add more to the Nate/Jenny storyline!
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