It seems like we've been waiting for Lady Gaga's new video to drop for weeks, and now it's finally arrived — all eight and a half minutes of it. I don't need to tell you that "Alejandro" is indulgent and over the top just like Gaga herself: it starts off looking like a cross between Edward Scissorhands and The Matrix as Gaga looks down from a tower at a pack of shirtless dudes dancing in perfect sync. Of course, she eventually joins them — in her skivvies — and there's a whole lotta writhing going on. I know that this isn't the first time the star has been compared to Madonna, but there's a lot of crossover here, from rosary beads to a cone (OK, machine gun) bra. Check it for yourself when you read more.