On this week's episode of "The Office," the employees try to do damage control after some paper went out with an obscene watermark involving a duck and a mouse in a...compromising position. The employees do their best to apologize to livid customers, including having Jim and Andy visit a high school where prom invitations were sent out on the tainted paper. Hilarity ensues. Check out my favorite parts from the show below.
- "Every week I’m supposed to take 4 hours and do a quality spot check at the paper mill, and of course the one year I blow it off, this happens.” — Creed
- "This day is bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S, this day is bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S..." –Kelly, having been chosen to instruct the others on customer service
- "I need two men on this — that’s what she said — no time! But she did — no time!” Michael, wrestling with his own off-color self
- "The only difference between me and a homeless man is this job, and I will do whatever it takes to survive. Like I did. When I was a homeless man.” — Creed
- Michael says they're at "Threat Level Midnight," which is also the name of the name of Michael's screenplay that
everyone performed in the conference room in Season 2.
- "My girlfriend made me a really good mix, beer me that disc." — Andy, using "beer me" to mean "hand me"
"Lord, beer me strength." — Jim
- Andy's high school student girlfriend's response to him, "This is weird. I gotta go to Spanish."
- "First rule of roadside beet sales: Put the most attractive beets on top, the ones that make you pull the car over and go 'Wow, I need this beet right now.' Those are the money beets." — Dwight, as he puts a plant next to Phyllis to obstruct her from the reporter's view
- "We didn’t do anything illegal. Except knock over a mailbox with her friends."
- "Might I point out that the sex appeared to be consensual. Both animals were smiling... I grew up on a farm, I have seen animals having sex in every position possible. Whoever drew this got it exactly right." —Dwight
- Angry Customer: "I'm calling the Better Busines Bureau."
Michael: "Yeah, well I'm calling the Ungrateful Beyotch Hotline!"
- Kevin and Oscar high-fiving each other but not actually touching.
- Jim singing "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" to cheer up Andy, which definitely made me tear up a little bit.
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Photos courtesy of NBC