Desperate Housewives was not at its best last season, and many people felt the series got a little cheesy and muddled. The first ten episodes of Season 3 seem promising, though, with many of the same old characters and antics, but also with new mysteries to mull over. In case you need a refresher course in what’s been going on so far on Wisteria Lane, read on.
Lynette grapples with the challenge of including Tom’s child Kayla in the Scavos’ lives, while trying to avoid Kayla’s mother, Nora. Nora, meanwhile, uses Kayla to manipulate her way into as many of the Scavo activities as possible. Tom decides he wants to leave the advertising world and open a pizza parlor, though Lynette thinks it’s a terrible and risky idea. Claiming to support Tom in whatever he does, Nora comes on to Tom, who rejects her. Then Lynette awesomely kicks open Nora’s door and tells her to keep her interactions with her husband and family strictly to dropping off Kayla at the house.
The following episode, titled “Bang” was the big shocker episode of the season. To find out why,
Carolyn Bigsby, neighbor and friend to Orson’s ex-wife Alma, is on a mission to hunt down her cheating husband, Harvey. She enters a crowded grocery store with a gun and holds everyone hostage as her way of making Harvey talk to her. Carolyn shoots Nora who, just before dying, asks Lynette to raise Kayla as her own daughter. Carolyn tries to shoot Lynette as well when Art, the new neighbor on Wisteria Lane, throws off Carolyn’s aim so the bullet only strikes Lynette’s shoulder. Edie’s nephew Austin tackles Carolyn to the ground and then a woman shoots her in the head.
One day Lynette and her son Parker come across Art’s basement which is full of toys and a pinball machine, as well as a wall of photographs of young boys in swimsuits. Lynette suspects him of sinister things and her suspicions ignite the neighbors’ fury towards Art. Art’s wheelchair-bound sister Rebecca lives with him, and she tells Lynette she is ruining their lives. When Art shows up at the holiday block party dressed as Santa Claus, he and Rebecca get the cold shoulder from all the neighbors. The stress is too much for Rebecca in her condition, and she dies. As Art is packing up to leave Wisteria Lane, he sneers menacingly at Lynette, and creepily alludes to the idea that now that Rebecca is gone he won’t have to hide his true self anymore.
The first ten episodes of this season could be called The Gaby and Carlos Fights. It’s the usual antics, times ten: over-the-top arguments, stubbornness, and vengeance, all jumbled up and confused with passion and affection. They ultimately call a truce, however, after seeing the real violence at the grocery store.
Xiao Mei’s water breaks at Bree and Orson’s wedding, yet when the baby is born, it is clearly African-American, and the fertility clinic admits that sometimes mistakes happen. During a spa weekend, Gaby runs into John, all grown up and sexier than ever. They enjoy a for-old-times-sake romp before Gaby learns that John is engaged, and, after the spa tryst, doesn’t want to continue to see Gaby for fear of losing his wife-to-be.
Gaby hopes to spark up her modeling career again but only manages to get a photo shoot in which she poses as the frumpy mother of a hot teenage girl. Frustrated and insecure, Gaby takes up an offer to teach beauty pageant skills to little girls. As a bonus, Gaby meets a gorgeous single dad, Bill, and the two start a promising flirtation.
After months of visiting Mike in the hospital, Susan hesitantly agrees to go on a date with Ian, a fellow caretaker of a comatose loved one. The two start dating, and then spend a weekend away together. Over this romantic weekend, Edie accidentally witnesses Mike waking up from his coma with a hazy memory, and she moves in on him, badmouthing Susan, and convincing Mike that he was in love with Edie. Thus, when Susan returns to Mike’s hospital room, overjoyed at his recovery, he is chilly toward her. Susan learns of Edie’s cruel tricks and is heartbroken, having no way to convince Mike otherwise.
Adding insult to injury, Edie’s nephew Austin comes to live with Edie and he starts flirting with Susan’s daughter Julie. Susan, believing Austin to be a bad influence, tries to end their relationship, but Julie ignores her mother’s wishes.
Susan learns from Carolyn Bigsby that Orson was the prime suspect in his wife’s murder, but when they searched his house, everything had been cleaned with bleach. When a woman’s body shows up, police think it might be Orson’s former wife, Alma, and they begin an investigation. There is a phone number written on her wrist which turns out to be for Mike’s plumbing service. When questioned, Mike’s memory loss prevents him from being able to give any solid answers. However, he does have a flashback to seeing a woman who looks like Alma or Monique in lingerie. The police take him to jail and, fearing that Mike might be guilty, Edie breaks up with him. Susan tells Mike she believes he’s innocent, even if he himself doubts it.
Determined to find evidence against Orson, Susan sneaks into his office and discovers a document showing that Orson was admitted into a mental institute in 1981. She takes the document to use in Mike’s case. Ian tells Susan he will pay for the best lawyer in town to bail Mike out if she promises to never see him again. She agrees.
After just two weeks of being engaged, Bree and Orson get married. At the reception, however, the police show up and bring the newlyweds into the station to view a body that may be Alma’s. Orson says it isn’t, but whispers an endearment to the body, calling her “Monique,” just before leaving the room.
Bree sees Andrew on a news special about homeless teenagers and tracks him down. He is resistant to coming home with her, but ultimately shows up on her doorstep. Meanwhile, Bree finds out that her daughter Danielle is seeing her history teacher, Mr. Faladi, and she goes to Mr. Faladi’s house with Danielle’s luggage, insisting Danielle move in with him if they are to continue with the affair. Mr. Faladi hastily breaks things off with Danielle who is so furious, she tells the school officials and Mrs. Faladi.
Carolyn Bigsby continuously warns Bree about Orson while Carolyn’s husband Harvey admits to Orson that he’s been having an affair with a French woman named Monique. Harvey says he is upset because Monique seems to have disappeared. Orson soon tips off the police to Harvey’s involvement with Monique, and the police take him in for questioning in Monique’s murder. Bree learns of Harvey's infidelity, and she tells Carolyn about Monique. This causes Carolyn to go on her rampage at the grocery store.
Since the holidays are coming up, Bree tracks down Orson’s mother, Gloria, and insists Gloria come live with them, to Orson’s frustration. Gloria proves a miserable house mate and tells Bree that Orson was cheating on Alma with Monique. Orson later explains that he and Alma became pregnant and were married for the sake of the child. Alma miscarried, but Gloria would not hear of divorce, so Orson resigned himself to an unhappy marriage with Alma. He then met Monique, and fell in love with her. Bree buys his story, and the two rent Gloria a condo to get her out of their lives. When Gloria’s ride shows up, we see that it’s Orson’s first wife, Alma!