The 5 Types of Guys You're Bound to Meet at the Gym
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The gym. It's your haven. You might feel a little more at home at the gym than at work, or heck, even your own home. It's the place you are at your worst and sweatiest, yet it's also the place that you're at your best. Your most hopeful. Your most powerful.
But as women, chances are hight that during a "moment" in our safe haven (aka the gym), our sanity and Zen attitude has been jarred by at least one of these five guys that women always seem to run into at the gym.
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The Creepy Guy
Some of these guys have actual issues and others don’t have proper social graces, but the weird man who stares, as if he’s from The Silence of the Lambs asking for “the lotion, Clarice,” is so unnerving that you almost wished you joined an all-female gym or decided to work out at home that day.
Even when you give him your pitiful “please don’t chop me up into pieces” face he still stares back blankly at you as if he doesn’t register your pain and the awkwardness of his stare. The struggle is real.
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The Out-of-Shape Guy
There you are, diligently executing each skull crusher to define your triceps with precision and good form but since you’re a gasp — girl — the out-of-shape guy has to come and save you with tidbits of advice. It doesn’t matter if his form is so awful it looks like he’s doing the robot while trying to do bicep curls. It doesn’t matter if you’ve got less body fat than he does. You’re a girl! Of course you need his advice! He’s just here out of the goodness of his own heart to help you learn a “little something” at the big old gym for the boys.
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The Nice Guy (Really)
He’s the best. He’s not pervy or macho, and he’s just plain-old great. Do you want someone to do some abs with you? He’ll join. Need a spot with that heavy lift? He’s got your back. This guy is a gym friend and one you can get and share tips with, without feeling like he’s trying to make the moves.
This guy always racks his weights like a gentleman.
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Mr. Thick Neck
You know Mr. Thick Neck, the guy who lifts four hours in the morning and four hours at night. He might even do push-ups in the middle of his day job, if he has one.
He leaves his three-pound weights on the machine right before you use it and, ahem, forgets to put them away. Why? He’s too busy admiring himself, occasionally lifting up his shirt to view his abs in case they had disappeared from the time he last looked 15 minutes ago.
He’s too busy slamming his weights down like he's trying to mark his territory, showing everyone else that he’s strong and able.
You envision him picking up chicks by saying, “I pick things up. I put them down. You know? Wanna see my guns?”
If that’s not terrible enough, you start to wonder if you have asthma because you’re hyperventilating until you realize, it’s just his combination of cologne, aftershave, and deodorant that is making you feel dizzy and wanting for air.
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The “Wanna Go Out Sometime?” Guy
While you’re in horrific pain squatting or while you’re doing those thigh machines that make you feel like you’re at the ob-gyn, there he is, sticking his head in saying, “Wanna go out sometime?”
It’s not that you mind getting asked out. It’s more that you’ve already said no about 20 times and you’re starting to feel a little stalked.
Thankfully, the gym has more Mr. Nice Guys than the creepy one or Mr. Thick Neck. But still, we wish there was some sort of Mr. Gym Conscience who walked around to deal with those few annoying stragglers. Wink.