Preschooler

In honor of Take Your Child to Work Day, we asked moms to tell us what their kids think they really do at work all day. When I asked my younger kids, they had different perspectives on my job (a parenting writer).

While my 3-year-old said, "Mommy does typing on the computer all day," my 10-year-old was a little more . . . well . . . blunt. He said I "write stuff about how kids are supposed to act and what their parents should do about it." Close, but not quite!

The moms we asked had much funnier answers to share. These answers are bound to make you giggle.

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"Is my child gifted?" Parents often wonder at one point or another whether their child is gifted. Here we've rounded up some basics to help you identify signs of giftedness in your child.

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Do you think spanking helps kids or hurts them?

About a week ago, I was standing in line at one of the tween/teen clothing shops at the mall with my daughter. The mom behind me and her young son started squabbling as the little guy became increasingly worked up over the long line and started squirming and whining that he wanted to leave. His mom kept demanding, "Stop it." Suddenly, the palm of her hand exploded against his backside — not once, but in rapid-fire motion, eliciting a burst of tears that turned into all-out wails.

My daughter and I were horrified, as it appeared almost everyone in line appeared to be too. The sadness on the little boy's face and his humiliation were palpable, and as his tears kept flowing, she resumed meting out her punishment.

My daughter and I talked about our disturbing feelings the entire way home. I told her how when I was growing up, these kinds of corporal punishment were standard in many homes. Spanking was just how parents disciplined.

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Preschoolers love to make messes. Just ask Circle of Moms member Jessica E., who describes a day in the life of her 3-year-old daughter this way: "She pulls my makeup down and smears it. She opens up bottles of shampoo and squirts them empty. She empties toothpaste on the walls, colors everywhere, and throws food everywhere (like a box of crackers or grapes)." Help, she begs. "I have tried everything. I just don't know what to do about all the messes and how to get her to stop."

Whether it's unrolling toilet paper, scattering toys throughout the house, or coloring on the walls, all this mess-making is a sign that your preschooler is doing her job: exploring the world. But even though her habit is developmentally appropriate, it can be hard to live with! Here, to the rescue, are three tips from Circle of Moms members on controlling the chaos, plus advice on how to deal with your little mess-maker's behavior in restaurants.

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One thing moms learn really fast is that little kids can't keep their clothes on. From the time they are 4 months old or so and start kicking or pulling off their booties, to toddlerhood, when they like to strip down and race around in their birthday suits, young kids prefer to be in the buff.

It's great fun in the summertime, when it's easy to let your kids splash through the sprinklers or play in the pool in the backyard sans bathing suits and cumbersome shorts and T's. But is it OK to let kids be seen naked at the beach or in public? At what age does it become taboo? Those are questions many Circle of Moms members start to wonder as their little ones get bigger.

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Holly H. is frustrated with her husband's parenting: "It seems that every time he has to deal with the kids he ends up getting into power struggles/arguments with them. One of the specific things that I hear him doing is telling the kids, 'If you don't . . . then you won't.' Instead of the more positive 'After you . . . then you can . . .' They react negatively to this and are much more likely to refuse to do whatever he's telling them to do than if he would say it the second way."

Holly's husband is reacting in a very normal way. Every parent has days when they've yelled so much they're at the end of their rope. Those are the days when you want to run away, and we've all been there. But before you pack your bags, let me share one possible reason why you're being forced to yell, and suggest a way to change things.

Young children tend to gravitate to where they experience the most energy. When a parent yells, he or she exudes a great deal of energy and attention. Think about it from a child's point of view. What do you do when you yell? You stop what you're doing, you turn around, you lock eyes with your child, and you focus all of your words on him. That's a bunch of attention! Children gobble that up and then use childlike reasoning and decide that misbehavior is a good way to get my parent's focused attention — even though they're yelling. No, I'm not going to suggest that you ignore a child's bid for attention; I think that's mean.

I know it's hard to believe that children think they're getting attention when a parent yells, but that's immature reasoning in action. Children don't see the whole picture yet, so they don't really know that behaving well is a better option, unless you show them, repeatedly.

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Have you ever looked away for just a moment, only to discover your little one on the brink of danger?

When Aurora, Colorado, mom Jessica Hayes moved her couch against a wall near a window to shampoo the carpets of their third-story apartment, little did she expect her 4-year-old son, Dylan to climb up onto the couch and fall three stories!

Keep reading to see how Dylan survived with barely a scratch — and what Hayes wants other parents to know.

It may not be the most politically correct thing to admit, but sometimes in order to get the laundry done, phone calls made, and other important things accomplished, we moms turn to the TV to keep our little ones occupied. Just because the TV is on though doesn’t mean your child has to be watching something without merit.

Many Circle of Moms members are working hard to make TV time worthwhile for their kids by setting time limits, not using the television for background noise, and paying more attention to the educational ratings and content of the shows.

Keep reading for nine shows recommended by our moms with preschool-aged kids.

"Kids will do well if they can" is a basic mantra that Dr. Ross Greene, acclaimed psychologist and director of Lives in the Balance, asks parents to keep in mind when dealing with kids.

Moms will do well if they can, too, although when it comes to discipline, we don't always do it as well as we can. Keep reading for some of the most common discipline mistakes moms make and regret.

There’s a lot of talk about academic readiness skills for children who are entering kindergarten, but being ready for school isn’t just about mastering academic skills.  Whether your child attends preschool or you find other socialization opportunities for him, by the time kindergarten rolls around he should be able to sail the "seven C’s" of preschool social skills.

1. Conversation

Preschoolers typically like to talk, but not always to each other. That was the case for mom Cathy L., who noticed the other kids in her son’s preschool class had conversations with each other while her son spoke mainly to her.

At 3 and 4 years old, children should be practicing the skills of conversation: talking in turn, staying on topic, and even reading other people's emotions and facial expressions. If your child is shy, he may require some extra time to gain this skill. That’s okay. As Circle of Moms member MaryEllen C. says: "Provide opportunities for making friends and joining in, but let the child decide when they are ready."

Keep reading to learn all seven.