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28 Years Old And I Want Answers

Dear Sugar
My boyfriend and I have been dating for two years now. He is 31, and I am 28. In all honesty, I never really thought age was all that important until I thought about having a family at a fairly decent age. We've lived together for over 10 months now, and we just purchased a house together. Right after buying the house, I freaked out. My family and friends started to worry about the commitment of my boyfriend. He was engaged prior to meeting me, and his fiancee broke off the engagement. Shortly after we began dating, he mentioned how much he wanted to marry me ... how perfect we were for each other...etc., Just the other day he asked if I thought we should get a dog this summer! A few months ago, when we purchased our home, I told him that he had until this December (2006) to "seal the deal". We live the life of a married couple, but we aren't actually married. Do you think it is a case of "why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free?" We have not had the closing to our home as of yet ... do you think I should get a lawyer involved to be financially secure? What is your advice for someone who is in this situation? The Free Cow

Dear Free Cow
Honestly, I am sorry to say that I don't think you should buy the house together. You're not married, not even engaged and if you should break up then you are going to incur a lot more problems than need be. Get the commitment first from him, BEFORE you make this huge financial commitment. If you should decide to go ahead with buying the house, then yes - you definitely need your own lawyer, separate from him to protect yourself financially. You also need to have a straight talk with him about marriage. You made one big mistake by giving him the December ultimatum but not following through with it. Now he may never think your threats are serious.

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