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The 4-Way: Conquering Long Distance

Divine Caroline and I are back with another edition of the 4-Way. Enjoy!

Dear 4-Way,

Recently, I broke up with a guy that I’d been dating for three months, but I’ve known him for six years. I am deeply in love with him, and we only broke up because we had to move away from each other because of jobs. We now live over two hours away from each other. I still can’t seem to date anyone else and neither can he. He doesn’t say that he doesn’t love me, but he told me he won’t say it because last time he said it, he got hurt. We see each other every other weekend, which has been fine, but today he informed me that he’s moving even further away—four hours!—which will make it harder on us since we won’t be able to see each other as often. Should I wait it out and see if something happens because I do love him, or should I try really hard to find someone new?—BH, San Antonio, Texas

To see DearSugar's answer

Dear BH,

There's no doubt about it, long distance relationships are hard, but if both people are willing to put forth a major level of commitment and understanding, they can work. Now would I voluntarily sign myself up for one? — no, but if I fell in love with someone who moved away, would I do my best to make it work? — yes.

You pose the question of finding someone else so flippantly. Although you haven't said I love you, it's pretty clear that you have something special so my advice to you is this: test drive the distance for a few months. If it's manageable, great. If you miss each other so insanely that you can't take it anymore, perhaps you should consider taking your relationship to the next level and move closer to each other. And then lastly, if you both find the distance to be just too hard to make it work, you'll have to sever the ties and go your separate ways.

At the end of the day BH, you'll never know what could be unless you give it a try. Good luck and I hope it all works out for you.

I actually have a unique opinion on this week's 4-Way so I guess till next time gang!

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