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Age of Losing Virginity

At What Age Does Virginity Become a Stigma?

The average teenage girl loses her virginity at 17.3 (17.0 for boys) in the United States, but the age at which it becomes a stigma can vary among subcultures, religions, and even schools.

Tina Fey famously held onto her virginity until she was 24, but one woman wrote about waiting until 32 in the Guardian Friday. And not because of religion!

Reasons ranged from fear it would hurt, anxiety about pregnancy and STDs, and a five-year illness until the reason was simply virginity itself. Why give it up if you've waited so long? Plus, sometimes the fear of revealing virginity after a certain age becomes a fear itself.

Most people have an age they don't want to reach and still be a virgin — what was, or is, yours?

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SnowSkier SnowSkier 4 years
Waited for my H.S. GF until I finally gave up at 20. I was a little past 21. As a guy I got hammered for being that age.. and there was no end to people poking fun at my expence .. for years. A very crummy experience. So I can say 21 is definitely a Stigma. 20 wouldn't have been any different.
SnowSkier SnowSkier 4 years
Waited for my H.S. GF until I finally gave up at 20. I was a little past 21. As a guy I got hammered for being that age.. and there was no end to people poking fun at my expence .. for years. A very crummy experience. So I can say 21 is definitely a Stigma. 20 wouldn't have been any different.
Venus1 Venus1 4 years
Good for you poster number 86. We should see our first time as a positive. It is not losing anything.
Teagan92 Teagan92 5 years
Should there be a stigma? I'm not really sure that is the right word. Do I think people look at your differently? Definitely. 19 I'm still a virgin and its by choice. I have had times where it could happen and just decided I didn't want too, but to think someone would need therapy because of being it passed a certain age is stupid. If you put a time limit on it then you will rush to get it done. Sadly it seems the times have changed where something as special as sex once was is now just given out like its whatever. I agree that the being frustrated can take over and I have had the backlash from friends with it. Of all my friends I am the only virgin and of all those friends I think only one friend has slept with less then 5. I don't judge what people do, if you are happy and enjoying your time then fine, have fun. Yet if I don't judge you I don't see why they choose to judge the virgin. Without fail they will bring up that, no matter what we are doing or anything. I will be talking to a guy somewhere anywhere and like that information is at all necessary they will somehow make sure to drop that secret and its ridiculous. To me its all personal choice. I'm not super religious, I don't fear my mom finding out and getting mad or anything because we are in a comfortable relationship where she understands it probably won't be my wedding night, I just don't have it on my top priority list right now. If it happens ok, if not, I'm not going to have a break down. I am one of those girls who prefer guys friends, mainly because as all girls no its less drama and more fun any but even though the sleep around, and they do, they talk to me differently about it. All my girl friends are like just do it, just have sex but surprisingly the guys are like just wait. Wait until you are in love, wait until you are comfortable and wait until YOU know you are ready. Because when the guy actually cares about you trust us when we say they don't care about that as much as you would think, some actually like it a lot more then a list. Sex is something that gets thrown in peoples faces all the time in today's world. I doubt unless you are watching a cartoon you will turn on a show where sex is not being talked about or happening. I don't judge girls for having sex young because its their bodies, and their lives and they know what is right for them at the time...All I say is if I don't judge you for sleeping with someone young or having a long list of guys before 25 don't tell me I need therapy for not sleeping with any.
Teagan92 Teagan92 5 years
Should there be a stigma? I'm not really sure that is the right word. Do I think people look at your differently? Definitely. 19 I'm still a virgin and its by choice. I have had times where it could happen and just decided I didn't want too, but to think someone would need therapy because of being it passed a certain age is stupid. If you put a time limit on it then you will rush to get it done.Sadly it seems the times have changed where something as special as sex once was is now just given out like its whatever. I agree that the being frustrated can take over and I have had the backlash from friends with it. Of all my friends I am the only virgin and of all those friends I think only one friend has slept with less then 5. I don't judge what people do, if you are happy and enjoying your time then fine, have fun. Yet if I don't judge you I don't see why they choose to judge the virgin.Without fail they will bring up that, no matter what we are doing or anything. I will be talking to a guy somewhere anywhere and like that information is at all necessary they will somehow make sure to drop that secret and its ridiculous. To me its all personal choice. I'm not super religious, I don't fear my mom finding out and getting mad or anything because we are in a comfortable relationship where she understands it probably won't be my wedding night, I just don't have it on my top priority list right now. If it happens ok, if not, I'm not going to have a break down.I am one of those girls who prefer guys friends, mainly because as all girls no its less drama and more fun any but even though the sleep around, and they do, they talk to me differently about it. All my girl friends are like just do it, just have sex but surprisingly the guys are like just wait. Wait until you are in love, wait until you are comfortable and wait until YOU know you are ready. Because when the guy actually cares about you trust us when we say they don't care about that as much as you would think, some actually like it a lot more then a list.Sex is something that gets thrown in peoples faces all the time in today's world. I doubt unless you are watching a cartoon you will turn on a show where sex is not being talked about or happening. I don't judge girls for having sex young because its their bodies, and their lives and they know what is right for them at the time...All I say is if I don't judge you for sleeping with someone young or having a long list of guys before 25 don't tell me I need therapy for not sleeping with any.
zeze zeze 5 years
*Why ...would love an edit button Tres.
zeze zeze 5 years
*Why...would love an edit button Tres.
zeze zeze 5 years
lol, you is a therapist needed all of a sudden at 25? Your reasons are the reason you would need therapy - if its bad reasoning, whether 15 or 35, you should seek counseling and vice versa.
zeze zeze 5 years
lol, you is a therapist needed all of a sudden at 25?Your reasons are the reason you would need therapy - if its bad reasoning, whether 15 or 35, you should seek counseling and vice versa.
PiNKHEART14 PiNKHEART14 5 years
i think a lot of people either are A) too casual about it, or B) too 'OCD' about it. you can spend your whole life overthinking it and worrying that you'll regret it. you'll only end up with nothing. it is a natural thing but also should be held sacred. sex is good for your body and mind (as long as it's practiced safely).
Venus1 Venus1 5 years
We shouldn't be taking pops at each other here. We all have our own views about when it was right or will be right for us. To be fare to Spacekat she did say "You shouldn't care about the stigma or what anyone else thinks....The reasons this woman described for waiting too long sound unhealthy to me. Lets not forget that sexuality is a normal part of human development, but some people have problems I think past the age of 25, one might consider seeing a therapist, because something is going on that's not healthy" She makes it clear throughout that it is her opinion and uses the word consider. Finally I repeat, I read the original article in The Guardian in full. The woman in question remained a virgin for years and then advertised for a random stranger to have sex with. Surely me having my first time on my 15th birthday with someone I trusted and liked was a far better first time; he was gentle and caring. I'm now 33 and far from messed up. It's when it's right for you.
Venus1 Venus1 5 years
We shouldn't be taking pops at each other here. We all have our own views about when it was right or will be right for us. To be fare to Spacekat she did say "You shouldn't care about the stigma or what anyone else thinks....The reasons this woman described for waiting too long sound unhealthy to me. Lets not forget that sexuality is a normal part of human development, but some people have problems I think past the age of 25, one might consider seeing a therapist, because something is going on that's not healthy"She makes it clear throughout that it is her opinion and uses the word consider.Finally I repeat, I read the original article in The Guardian in full. The woman in question remained a virgin for years and then advertised for a random stranger to have sex with.Surely me having my first time on my 15th birthday with someone I trusted and liked was a far better first time; he was gentle and caring. I'm now 33 and far from messed up. It's when it's right for you.
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