I have been dating a guy off and on for the last five years. We started out as a casual friendship, but now are more serious. He is currently teaching and living in another country but we have stayed together since he's been there; we talk daily and have visited each other since he's been away. He has plans to work one more year and then return home, but he is living with me this summer for two months and we are planning a lot of fun vacations. The problem is: When I bring up anything that bothers me, he gets defensive and says that he should have known better to stay with me, that he is already out of his comfort zone and giving more than he thought, and that I pressure him too much to be more serious than we are by my words and actions. Although he has recently committed to me, he still says that he's "serious about me and wants to be with me, but is not ready for a really serious relationship." He said that he feels pressured to get married, although I haven't told him that I want to. Every time he responds this way I shut down, get highly emotional, and am distracted from everything else going on in my life for most of the day. My question is: What can I do to not react this way, and what can I do to avoid this same conversation with him? I have decided that he is who I want to be with; I've never loved anyone more, and we get along great besides these repeating conversations. What should I do?
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