Skip Nav

Ask E. Jean: Because of You, I'm Not Getting Lingerie!

Ask E. Jean: Because of You, I'm Not Getting Lingerie!

To honor Valentine's Day, I wanted to revisit this awesome E. Jean post that will be perfect for those of you who are big lingerie fans!

Dear E. Jean,

I have been wanting my husband to buy me lingerie since we have been together. Never once has that happened. I’ve done everything I can think of and have been frustrated that he hasn’t.

It has been ingrained in him for years that buying lingerie for your partner is wrong and will end in disaster. He has specifically directed me to interviews and statements by you, E. Jean. Below is part of one such interview you did on CNN:
CARROLL: “That's right. Do not give that lady lingerie because if YOU (the guy) like it, I guarantee she (the woman) won't. She gets that box, and says ‘how nice.’ But she's thinking in the back of her mind, ‘I'm going to open it up, it's going to be red net undies.’ And then when she sees it, she knows the guy expects her to put those on and cavort around like Janet Jackson at the halftime show. It is bad. No women likes that.
SOLEDAD O'BRIEN: So, don't give lingerie at all?
O'BRIEN: Even though everyone thinks it's sexy, it's not sexy at all?
CARROLL: Nobody wants it. You pull out the pushup bra, your chest is up to here. It's horrible.

E. Jean! I’d like to say, speak for yourself, you do not speak for me and I know for a fact there are other women who adore knowing their partner will spend the time to shop and pick out something sexy, beautiful, and romantic that they would like to share with their partner in their intimacy. Your all-inclusive comments are inappropriate. How dare you suggest you would know what “all” women want? You make it harder for all the many that don’t fall into your bubble of an idea
— I Want Lingerie!

To see E. Jean's answer

My Darling,
I was wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong!
Not to mention dense, narrow-minded, pea-brained, and dumb. For although I think that men have to be out of their minds to even attempt to buy me that tasty, little crotch-free trick teddy with matching fingertip gloves, black-velvet wrist bows, and blindfold — and although the last thing I want to see in a box is pair of eerie fishnet underpants with their lewd little puckered-leg holes staring up at me — and although I have nothing but the most hideous memories of being presented with a fancy undergarment that when I put it on, cut off my circulation and made me look like I had bound myself with piano wires — you, madam, know what you want. And by god! We’re going to get it for you!

Show your husband this post IMMEDIATELY. I have something to say to him:
Hello there, sir! E. Jean, the-Heinous-Know-It-All here. Go buy your girl some lingerie! Better yet, go together. She’s a lovely, smart woman, and deserves the best! Happy Valentine’s Night to you both!

To see more advice from E. Jean visit Elle magazine and

Latest Love
Looking for the perfect gift this holiday season? Order our POPSUGAR Must Have box now >>