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Ask E. Jean For DearSugar: I Adore My Friend, But So Does Everyone Else!

Dear E. Jean,

I have a friend who's so beautiful that every man who crosses our path wants her. This is not paranoia. It's reality. Even movie stars gawk at her on the street — ugh! More cases in point? My ex casually asked me if she was dating anyone, my current ex joked about a three-way, and a man who's been pursuing me for a year has suddenly shifted his interest to her after he met her at a dinner party.

She's funny, charming, and doesn't dress slutty (we're both casual and conservative). I don't have animosity toward her — I adore her — and I'm sure I'm supposed to learn something from this, but what? I'm not unattractive, but now that I'm newly single, I know that every guy who's interested in me won't be once he meets her. I feel like a walking consolation prize. Why is she so irresistible? And what can I do about it? — The Leftover

To see what E. Jean has to say,


Left, My Lovely: Oh please. If the lady's such a vexation, don't be seen in public with her. As it is, I've probably received two or three letters from your friends complaining that you are the irresistible one.

This is the hard truth about makeovers, Miss Leftover. We're all the pretty one/ugly one depending on 1.) who we’re with and 2.) how chock-full of good old-fashioned confidence we are. You love her, however, so if she's as ravishing on the inside as she is on the outside, well then . . . since she has the power to keep men on the boil, don’t fight it, use it, Miss Left! Let her bring 'em on! When the lads stampede, simply sweep up the shy ones floundering in her wake. And once you've met someone, for godssakes, don't be stupid. Keep the dude away from her.

To see more advice from E. Jean, visit Elle Magazine and

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