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Backhanded Compliments

Dish! What Backhanded Compliment Have You Heard?

A scoop of criticism with a cherry on top, anyone? Backhanded compliments can be the fiercest of insults. Chances are we've probably all heard them and even served them up at some point or another. I prefer to think that most of this nasty flattery is an accidental result of someone speaking before thinking. But giving our offender the benefit of the doubt doesn't take away the sting of a blindsided burn. So you tell me: What backhanded compliment have you heard or — mean girl alert! — dropped on someone else? Here are a few to get us started:

  • You're really filling out.
  • I'm so jealous you don't have to wear a bra every day.
  • Hey! Your face cleared up!
  • If you were taller, you could be a model.
  • You look so nice today, I almost didn’t recognize you.
  • That tasted better than it looked.
  • It's so refreshing to have a conversation with someone who doesn't feel the need to prove they are smart.
  • You're smart to do your laundry on Saturday night, when everyone else is out.
  • Nice dress. I've seen a lot of girls wearing it, but I think it suits you most.
  • You look like a porn star.
  • Source

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twinmomof3 twinmomof3 5 years
"Is that your granddaughter" a teenage cashier asks me at a Dunkin' Donuts. I am 47 and my daughter is 9. I tell her she is my daughter and I stress the word daughter. I keep my composure and I walk out. Once I get out, I lose it. I cry for half the day.
Astro_nerd Astro_nerd 8 years
Also note: there is nothing wrong with my face!
Astro_nerd Astro_nerd 8 years
Wow, ashearer...that is something very difficult to explain away! Birthing hips! Haha!! I once got told a whole list of reasons why I could never be a model...”body not long enough”, “something wrong with my face” “breasts too big” (Note: my breasts are a pretty average size, just considered big by the modelling world because they ACTUALLY EXIST.)
wiciltd wiciltd 8 years
My grandpa called me handsome, and said I had good birthing hips ...Not quite sure if I should have been offended by that or not
ashearer ashearer 8 years
my fiance's mother was coming over, and one of my bras was on the floor. he said "let's hide your enormous brassiere, okay?" and then spent the next ten minutes explaining how "enormous brassiere" is a compliment. ><
ashearer ashearer 8 years
my fiance's mother was coming over, and one of my bras was on the floor. he said "let's hide your enormous brassiere, okay?" and then spent the next ten minutes explaining how "enormous brassiere" is a compliment. ><
tweet-hotpants tweet-hotpants 8 years
one of my ex-boyfriends told me i could be a chubby model. at the time i was 5'4", 110 lbs. gee, thanks.
sweetpeabrina sweetpeabrina 8 years
Haha Bella! I get the reverse. "You're so lucky you don't have a big butt." I would like a little junk. Guess I gotta do more squats.
juliarose23 juliarose23 8 years
haha i get the model one a lot
chapsticknchanel chapsticknchanel 8 years
I've gotten the 'if you were taller you could be a model' one before, but it never really offended me. I'm not short (I'm 5'6"), just not tall enough to be a model.
Tech Tech 8 years
My grandma is the queen of them: my personal fave was "Oh, wow, you've REALLY lost a lot of weight!" with a big ol' smile. I also hate the reverse backhanded compliment--my sister can never take one. If you say "hey, you look really cute today," she usually responds with "what, do I look like crap every other day?" Learn how to take a compliment, girls!
Tech Tech 8 years
My grandma is the queen of them: my personal fave was "Oh, wow, you've REALLY lost a lot of weight!" with a big ol' smile.I also hate the reverse backhanded compliment--my sister can never take one. If you say "hey, you look really cute today," she usually responds with "what, do I look like crap every other day?"Learn how to take a compliment, girls!
ddene5713 ddene5713 8 years
i've gotten the "omg i haven't seen you in forever, you look great" then immediately say "not that you didn't look good to begin with, just saying you look good" haha. yaaaa.
Beauty Beauty 8 years
I get "You've got a big butt for a white girl." Oh, thanks — I've always wanted random people to talk about my arse. Especially nice when it's implied that somehow white people don't have big bottoms but other people do...?!?
gigglegirl gigglegirl 8 years
Or how about: "You clean up nicely." Grrr...
SugarKim4203 SugarKim4203 8 years
I've gotten "you look really good with make up on."
7bits 7bits 8 years
"If I weren't a lesbian, I'd be all over you"
steviasweet steviasweet 8 years
"Wow, you've lost all your baby weight!" My son was 2 at the time, and I'd lost the weight when he was 6 months... Also, "Your hair looks good (insert long pause) today."
steviasweet steviasweet 8 years
"Wow, you've lost all your baby weight!" My son was 2 at the time, and I'd lost the weight when he was 6 months...Also, "Your hair looks good (insert long pause) today."
k_izzle k_izzle 8 years
I've gotten the "Your face looks clearer!" one before.
Karma87 Karma87 8 years
At the salon where I used to model hair at shows for the owner -who wasn't there the time- one of the stylists said, "You've got some make-up on today! You look nice!" Ugh.
bengalspice bengalspice 8 years
I told a girl her hair didn't look any different after she got a haircut.
JennaV JennaV 8 years
I have people say....wow, you have a LOT of hair. I want to say no shit shirlock. I mean, if they only knew what a pain it is and how I don't think that it is a compliment at all. If I see someone who I have not seen in awhile and I think they look great, I tell them! I hope no one gets offended....I certainly wouldn't if someone told me that.
JennaV JennaV 8 years
I have people say....wow, you have a LOT of hair. I want to say no shit shirlock. I mean, if they only knew what a pain it is and how I don't think that it is a compliment at all.If I see someone who I have not seen in awhile and I think they look great, I tell them! I hope no one gets offended....I certainly wouldn't if someone told me that.
Masqueraded_Angel Masqueraded_Angel 8 years
Ok, listen...I work at a salon, and I swear on EVERYTHING I have heard every single one of these at least ONCE. Seriously, the girls there are so catty...but of course they try to sugar-coat everything while they're doing it. *Sigh* California hair stylists are a piece of work...
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