I have been dating my boyfriend for seven months now, known him for nine. He's truly a great guy — one in a million. I've never been able to relate to someone as much as I've had with him. I love him very much, but there's only one problem: the sex isn't good. We've talked about the situation before, and I could tell I've hurt his ego, which is one of the most important things to a guy, but I had to let him know and get to the bottom of it. I didn't want to have sex and not get pleasure from it when he was the only one benefiting from it. I told him that sex is a big part of a relationship, but there's other qualities that fill in for what he's lacking. He suggested that we slow down on doing it so much, but I didn't see how that would solve this unfortunate circumstance.
Keep reading for the rest of the dilemma and to help her out with your advice.
We do a lot of foreplay, and I try almost everything: positions, places, and techniques. I told him we should experiment until we find what works best for us, but nothing has come out of it. I try to tell him what feels good to me, but I hardly ever do because I myself don't know. He's my first, so it's really frustrating for me when I'm not getting any good out of it. I told him I don't have sex with him because I like it; I do it because I like who I'm doing it with, I like the idea, and I like pleasing him. Like I said, I don't base our relationship off of sex, but it's a sad case if sometimes I want it to be over with or when I can't even reach orgasm. I wanna wake up extremely happy in the morning, too. I'm giving up hope that I'll ever be willing to enjoy myself when having sex. I came once, but that was when he went down on me, and even that's not good because it seems as though he doesn't know how to do that well either. Seven months and still nothing — help!