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Boyfriend Always Wants to Hang Out

Group Therapy: Boyfriend Wants to Spend Too Much Time Together

This question is from a Group Therapy post in our TrèsSugar Community. Add your advice in the comments!

My boyfriend and I have been together 3 years and have been living together for 1 1/2 years. Our relationship is going well, and recently we have begun talking about marriage and children more seriously.

But I have a bit of a concern. We both work long hours, but when we're not working, we spend almost all of our time together. I have more of an active social life than he does, as most of his friends before we met were single party guys — obviously they have little in common these days so many of them have fallen by the wayside. He hasn't made many new friends since we got together, so most of his social life revolves around me and my friends now. I've tried encouraging him to do more hobbies and to build friendships with his colleagues, but he always says he hasn't met anyone that he really clicks with and that he's too tired from work to have more hobbies.

I like to be alone every now and then, but he seems to always want to be with me. Even when he has a random errand to run that has nothing to do with me, he gets upset if I don't want to come along (not angry, just kind of sad). I don't think I need to go with him to pick up his contact lenses or buy a new cell phone — it's not like we share a car (we live in a city so use public transportation) so it's just a waste of time and money for me to go, too. I feel like we don't need to spend every single second that we're not at work together, but if I say so, he takes it the wrong way.

I'm afraid we are going to get sick of each other if we don't spend more time apart, but I don't know how to say this without him getting upset, as he is very sensitive. I think he'd also be happier in general if he didn't rely on me so much as his only buddy/social outlet. Any advice?

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