I can't seem to get over the fact that my boyfriend has been married before. It's probably 4 years ago since he's been divorced. We've been dating for almost a year and he thinks that I'm the one and talks to me about marriage and children. I think he MAY BE the one for me too. He's a very loving, generous, smart boyfriend and I don't think there will be anyone else out there for me. I feel very lucky to have him! He is 40 and I am 24. We love each other a lot and get along well but this is really bothering the hell out of me.
He doesn't bring her up but we do talk about our past relationships from time to time if it affects the present. I guess I can't get over the fact that he said she was the love of his life and that the happiest time was when he got married and the saddest was when he got divorced. I feel like I would always be second best. How could I live up to someone who made him feel that way? Even when we talk randomly about the wedding he didn't want to go through all the traditional stuff again like at Hispanic weddings and he doesn't think diamonds are necessary for a wedding ring. And he admitted that his first marriage changed his views on all of this.
I imagine myself walking down the aisle and have him looking at me and being so happy but I keep imagining that he's probably thinking "I've done this before." I just wish it was a brand new feeling for both of us.
Plus, he's traveled to many places around the world when he was with her. We talk about traveling all the time and every time I point out to a country or a state I'd like to visit because I haven't really gone anywhere, he's been there and probably with his ex-wife. I feel like there's nothing left for us to go besides Antarctica.
We've talked about this issue several times and he has assured me that I'm his priority and there's no one else but me in his heart and he has no feelings for her. I don't know what to do. I feel like I'll never get over this.