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Can Guys And Girls Be Friends?

Dear Sugar
I am divorced with two small children and I am in serious relationship with a wonderful man. It has come to my attention that my boyfriend still sees his ex fiancée, who is engaged to another man, from time to time. I also found out that one of his close friends that I know used to be his girlfriend in high school. She is now married with children but my boyfriend still visits them regularly.

I am not a possessive woman and I don't necessarily need my boyfriend to be with me every second, but is it odd that he keeps such close relationships with these women? My parents think this behavior is a great big red flag that I should be concerned about it. It really didn't bother me at first, but the more I think about it, maybe I'm just being naive. Should I be worried? Apprehensive Annabelle

To see DEARSUGAR's answer

Dear Apprehensive Annabelle
Are you upset about your boyfriend's relationships with these woman or are your parents making you second guess his intentions? Why are you now just finding out about these friendships? Are you feeling like he has been hiding these women from you?

If you're feeling insecure, talk to your boyfriend as he could be clueless that these friendships are hurting you. Trust your own instincts and try not to let your parents judgement interfere in your relationship. Has your boyfriend ever given you a reason to doubt him in the past? If his friendships with these woman are affecting your relationship, something has to change.

Can men and women be friends? - is an age old question. Each person has their own opinion on this matter but it ultimately depends on what feels right for each couple. If you are uncomfortable with these friendships, then your boyfriend should respect your feelings and back off. Good luck.

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