I have been with my boyfriend for two years and have always thought we would get married. We are religious Christians and have planned to live a Christian life. He graduated college and started working for a large law firm this September and we have since grown distant.
His company demands extensive hours, sometimes up to 70 hours a week, and he has training for exams almost every weekend. In addition to not getting to spend time with my boyfriend as much anymore, his co-workers promote an unchristian lifestyle by going out after work partying and drinking.
He says going out helps him release the stress but I am having a hard time accepting his new way of life. I have expressed my feelings to him three times since November, but nothing seems to help and he refused to change. Do you have any advice for me? Homebody Helen
To see DEARSUGAR's answer read more
Dear Homebody Helen
Growing distant from your partner can be heartbreaking and extremely confusing, but you can't stop people from evolving into themselves. When you bring up your concerns, is your boyfriend understanding? Have you come to the table with any suggestions to help with his time management?
It sounds like you are struggling with the fundamental problem of your boyfriend straying from his Christian ways. Have you considered that he could he be giving into peer pressure in order to fit in at work and that this phase might pass? Do you still believe you can build a future with him even though he is deviating from your beliefs?
Try taking a step back and find out if your boyfriend is willing to work on making time for both his job and his personal life. If you are still feeling left out in the cold, perhaps this relationship has changed too much for you to mend. Hang in there and good luck.