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Co-Worker Likes My Boyfriend

"My Co-Worker Has Feelings For My Boyfriend"

This question is from a Group Therapy post in our TrèsSugar Community. Add your advice in the comments!

I desperately need some advice. Here goes . . .

Me, my friend, and new boyfriend work at the same workplace. My friend is pretty close to my boyfriend as they work in the same department. I was fine with this before I found out she had a crush on him at the same time as me. It all started when I told her that I had a crush on this guy. I told him how I felt, and we eventually started dating. She then told me that she had a crush on him the same time I did. Even though she had a bf at the time, and she knew that I liked him, she still told him how she felt about him. He didn't respond to her feelings. I had no idea about this until we went on our first date, and my friend told me the next day.

I have never had a problem with their friendship until now. They spend a lot of time together at work (he spends his lunchtime with her), and he never makes any effort to see me at work. I am really uncomfortable about them together now that I know how she once felt, and I can't help but feel anxiety. Am I wrong to feel this way? She has become colder toward me since we started dating, and I don't think she realizes it. I can't go on dating him knowing that they go for coffee together after work and they spend a lot of time together at work.

I have doubts about this guy anyway because he ignores me at work (he wants to keep us a secret because he is worried that we will lose credibility) yet he spends all his spare time with my friend. He texts me once a day (yes, really!) and does not phone. I don't mind that, but it just adds to my doubts about him. Am I being paranoid?

Please help me.

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