Yesterday, I broke up with my boyfriend without actually intending to. After coming back from a three-week trip to Europe, I realized things weren't the same between us anymore. I wasn't sure where our relationship was going, so I went to his house to tell him. Two months ago, we bought train tickets to go on a one-week camping trip with his family, and I wanted to tell him that I'd decided not to go. After telling him, he said that he expected I'd say something like that and that he didn't want me to come, either — he just didn't know how to tell me since the train tickets had been so expensive. We talked a bit more and realized that we didn't have any good reasons to stay together, and that we had become more like friends with benefits than an actual couple. He seemed very relieved after we both decided to break up.
We have the same friends and had planned to go out together that night, so he asked me if I still wanted to go. I said yes and we were on our way out when it started to rain outside, so we got all covered up in plastic bags and left on our bikes. We were laughing and teasing each other, which I found weird since it was as if nothing had happened. All the way down to the bar, he couldn't stop talking and making jokes, saying, ''Does this mean I'm free to hit on anyone I like?'' and ''Tell your parents I loved their food!'' I had absolutely nothing to say and felt kind of sad that he was taking it so well.
As soon as we got to the bar, I felt 10 times better and talking to my friends made things less awkward. I played pool, danced, and had a good time. He sat down at a table almost alone, while everyone talked and walked around. He drank all night and didn't say much. As I was about to leave, I remembered he had locked our bikes together so I went over to him to ask if he could unlock them. We stepped outside and he said, ''I don't know what happened, but I feel really down. It kind of hit me that there's going to be this big hole in my life now." We chatted a bit and I said that I hoped he would get through it quickly, have a nice trip, etc. He said he'd probably need to think a lot this week. I'm totally confused by his reaction: did he want to break up, or was it just to save his ego? How should I react?