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DEARSUGAR NEEDS YOUR HELP: Long Distance Love Is Easier Said Than Done

DEARSUGAR and Sleepless Selena need your help. Her boyfriend sounds pretty apathetic toward her, but is she using her ex to fill a void in her current relationship? I wonder why they broke up in the first place if he's so special to her?

Dear Sugar
I have dated my current boyfriend for almost two years. So far this is the most committed relationship I've ever been in as well as the most emotionally draining. We've had some extreme ups and downs, but overall it's been worth the bumpy ride.

Recently my boyfriend accepted a job in a city over six hours away and he hasn't made it specifically clear he wants me to join him. We had talked about it informally before he applied for jobs but never in a serious way. Now that he's been gone (about two months) I've seen him once and he barely calls. I feel like I am the only one who is trying to keep things together.

He says he wants to stay together, but I don't even feel like he's trying. To make things even more complicated, I've been interviewing for a job out of state and my boyfriend barely seems to care. What bothers me the most is that the city I could possibly be moving to is where my ex lives.

Ever since our breakup he and I have remained friends and we've been talking a lot more since I've been considering moving there. I have to say that it's been pretty amazing having him back in my life again. We connect well and I feel like we really care about each other. I actually feel like a priority to him which has made me realize how little I might mean to my current boyfriend.

I don't want to break up with my boyfriend, but it seems like I don't even have one anymore. Is it wrong to want to cut my losses before I get hurt even more? I wonder if moving away and focusing on my career will help me more in the long run than staying in a dying relationship for too long. Please help. Sleepless Selena

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