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Do Tell: What Was the Cause of Your Quarterlife Crisis?

The new NBC show Quarterlife debuted last night and I have a funny feeling people are going to be hooked. We've all heard of midlife crises, but lucky for us, we have to go through a quarterlife crisis first! It's that wavering period of uncertainty where you don't quite know who you are, what you want to do with your life, who your true friends are, or what your purpose is. I'm thankful I've already experienced mine, but what about you? If you're already past that bump in the road, do tell, what was the cause of your quarterlife crisis?

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Connieee Connieee 8 years
Thank God I'm not the only one! I've always thought that there must be something wrong with me. Mine started 3 years ago after I got fired from my job as a designer. It was a job that I loved and after that I just didn't know what to do coz maybe I just sucked at it. So now, I've tried a lot of things but I still haven't figured out what I really wanted to do. I'm still unemployed.
geohiker geohiker 8 years
AMP - I'm right there with you! My quarterlife crisis was definitely graduating from law school. I hated every minute I spent there, but my profs really discouraged me from dropping out, because it's very common for people to be miserable in law school. A hundred grand in debt (hobbled financially for decades to come) I - and more than half of my class at a very good law school - could not get a law job. I ended up drifting around professionally for a while, working a bunch of short-term jobs and making just enough money to live on (driving up those loans with compounded interest!). Oh, my parents were so proud! :) But, eventually I found a career field I really love and I have been really happy since then. I found (and married) a wonderful guy, and although those loans will hamper me for years to come, I did indeed successfully survive the quarterlife crisis. So, have hope, for those still in the midst of it; time passes and things indeed do change, and if you work at it, they change for the better. :)
geohiker geohiker 8 years
AMP - I'm right there with you! My quarterlife crisis was definitely graduating from law school. I hated every minute I spent there, but my profs really discouraged me from dropping out, because it's very common for people to be miserable in law school. A hundred grand in debt (hobbled financially for decades to come) I - and more than half of my class at a very good law school - could not get a law job. I ended up drifting around professionally for a while, working a bunch of short-term jobs and making just enough money to live on (driving up those loans with compounded interest!). Oh, my parents were so proud! :)But, eventually I found a career field I really love and I have been really happy since then. I found (and married) a wonderful guy, and although those loans will hamper me for years to come, I did indeed successfully survive the quarterlife crisis. So, have hope, for those still in the midst of it; time passes and things indeed do change, and if you work at it, they change for the better. :)
AMP AMP 8 years
Finishing law school, realizing I was in my mid-twenties with over $100,000 in debt, had no job/income yet and really wasn't happy with my decision to have gone to law school. I always thought I'd be a homeowner by the time I was done with school, but ha! not even close to being a possibility at that time, nor this time, a few years later.
CoconutPie CoconutPie 8 years
I'm in it. Difficult times... I'm moving 7000 km away from home, leaving everything behind to be with my soon-to-be husband. I hope I'll figure some things out (like what I want to do or be). I have a feeling it's all for the best.
lovelie lovelie 8 years
I don't know if this could be categorized as a quarterlife crisis but I know that I am not happy where I am right now. I have one year left for my undergraduate and I love the school, but I hate the location it's in. TOO small, can't stand the people, and I'm just done with it all. The only shread of hope I am hanging on to is the selection of law schools I am applying to, and the dream of living in an awesome metropolitan city where you don't have to see the same faces everytime you want to go have a drink downtown. GRR.
princess_eab princess_eab 8 years
I think I'm still in mine.... and I'm 28! I had a couple of low-end jobs but a circle of great friends, then moved overseas to get a degree, then back, then across the country to get my last degree... and I'm so lonely I wish I had never gotten the degrees. I don't know if I can make it through the Ph.D., or if I will have a job. I miss my friends, and the city is expensive and lonely. I love my boyfriend, though-- part of the earlier crisis was dating a lot of unsuitable guys, so at least that is over. Still, I have dreams about being a housewife with three kids and not having to deal with a career. I don't think I am strong enough to handle a career anymore. It's sad but true.
aphaziak aphaziak 8 years
Definitely in the middle of mine as well... 5 years have now passed since I graduated high school, and it seems like I'm stuck in this rut on how to move forward. My job is comfortable, but boring, I find that the people I surrounded myself with the last 5 years are not the kind of people I want to go forward with in life, and I hate the state I live in!!!! I just can't figure it all out... what career should I work towards? Where do I want to land up in life? Etc. Etc. Etc. It was comforting to read some of these, and to know that it's not just me!!!
AvaSofia AvaSofia 8 years
My quartelife crisis came in 2007 and it sucked. It really put a strain on my marriage and my mothering of my two beautiful little girls . . . I'm happy to say that my husband and I worked through it all and we're in the best place in our marriage/life but it'll be years before I can let go of the guilt and regret. Mine was caused by anger and confusion with a church (more cult-like than anything) I was a part of for many years and left about 4 years ago. But again, to be where we are now, I'd go through that crisis over and over again . . .
Jenny-Hyatt Jenny-Hyatt 8 years
I had not heard the term quarterlife crisis until it started coming up on my site bigwhitewall.com - it seems like a lot of people have one. And then i remembered that i did too - the cause was dating too many people simultaneously, a little dabbling in illegal substances and one hell of a lot of pressure in my work. I wish i had known at the time that it was more common. I find that having an anonymous space like ours is a great place to be able to talk about these things - as you don't always feel able to let others know that you are struggling with some stuff.
pink_magnetism pink_magnetism 8 years
I think I'm in it now.
pink_magnetism pink_magnetism 8 years
I think I'm in it now.
kapikani kapikani 8 years
I know I'm going through it right now. I have a beautiful baby, a husband who supports us financially, we live in a great house, and live in a decent neighborhood. So why am I in such a crappy hole? For starters, when my husband and I got married (3 years ago) we moved 300 miles away from all our friends and family. We moved because he got a job offer he couldn't refuse. So, I finished my BA at the crappy university that was 40 miles away from home (yes I drove everyday); I got pregnant (planned), and am now a stay-at-home mom. The reason I'm feeling really down lately, is because I'm at home with my baby all the time, and most times we don't leave the house for over a month. I'm in desperate need of seeing people and places. I can't remember the last time I had an intellectual conversation or any conversation. We live in a city that's small and that's just barely starting to update to what the rest of the bigger cities look like and have. That said, in order for us to go shopping or to go to restaurants we have to go to the surrounding cities. So, if we want Olive Garden or the mall, we have to drive an hour up north or an hour down south. It really sucks because I can't even shop for a few simple things without driving a lot of miles. I know this may not be a big deal for most of you. But for someone who lived in a big city all her life, this is pretty tough. After 3 years I'm still trying to get used to the loneliness. Oh and it doesn't help living next to older folks or neighbors who keep to themselves and who don't really socialize.
kapikani kapikani 8 years
I know I'm going through it right now. I have a beautiful baby, a husband who supports us financially, we live in a great house, and live in a decent neighborhood. So why am I in such a crappy hole? For starters, when my husband and I got married (3 years ago) we moved 300 miles away from all our friends and family. We moved because he got a job offer he couldn't refuse. So, I finished my BA at the crappy university that was 40 miles away from home (yes I drove everyday); I got pregnant (planned), and am now a stay-at-home mom. The reason I'm feeling really down lately, is because I'm at home with my baby all the time, and most times we don't leave the house for over a month. I'm in desperate need of seeing people and places. I can't remember the last time I had an intellectual conversation or any conversation. We live in a city that's small and that's just barely starting to update to what the rest of the bigger cities look like and have. That said, in order for us to go shopping or to go to restaurants we have to go to the surrounding cities. So, if we want Olive Garden or the mall, we have to drive an hour up north or an hour down south. It really sucks because I can't even shop for a few simple things without driving a lot of miles. I know this may not be a big deal for most of you. But for someone who lived in a big city all her life, this is pretty tough. After 3 years I'm still trying to get used to the loneliness. Oh and it doesn't help living next to older folks or neighbors who keep to themselves and who don't really socialize.
Jude-C Jude-C 8 years
Thanks, Asia84! And...that second paragraph...:ROTFL:
Jude-C Jude-C 8 years
Thanks, Asia84!And...that second paragraph...:ROTFL:
Asia84 Asia84 8 years
To Jude C: i don't think anything is impossible or too ambitious. if you know what it takes to acheive it and you are persistant, then it should happen. never discount any dreams you may have. . . unless you're ambitions were to be a Playmate who wins an Oscar.
Asia84 Asia84 8 years
To Jude C:i don't think anything is impossible or too ambitious. if you know what it takes to acheive it and you are persistant, then it should happen.never discount any dreams you may have. . . unless you're ambitions were to be a Playmate who wins an Oscar.
Asia84 Asia84 8 years
I've always knew what i wanted to do for a career. and i set the goals, and i have achieved them. i love my life right now. yeah, i find that friends are weird and all that social drama. but i'm kinda cut and dry. if i don't like how you "roll", then i stop foolin' with you. same with men. if you do something i don't like (like say you don't have children, and i find out a week later you're married with 2.5 kids . ..yes, this has happen to me) then i dump them. luckily i'm not needy for a man. i know that a few friends at this age go through that. but men come and go. and the right one (you know, who loves that i'm a bossy neurotic b*tch) will come along. no pressure. i'm pretty financially stable at the moment. but if things get too hard, i know that it's a part of life. i happy with my body, and i KNOW my morals and values. and i have a pretty decent connection with the Big G.
Asia84 Asia84 8 years
I've always knew what i wanted to do for a career. and i set the goals, and i have achieved them. i love my life right now.yeah, i find that friends are weird and all that social drama. but i'm kinda cut and dry. if i don't like how you "roll", then i stop foolin' with you.same with men. if you do something i don't like (like say you don't have children, and i find out a week later you're married with 2.5 kids . ..yes, this has happen to me) then i dump them. luckily i'm not needy for a man. i know that a few friends at this age go through that. but men come and go. and the right one (you know, who loves that i'm a bossy neurotic b*tch) will come along. no pressure.i'm pretty financially stable at the moment. but if things get too hard, i know that it's a part of life. i happy with my body, and i KNOW my morals and values. and i have a pretty decent connection with the Big G.
oh-cecilia-baby oh-cecilia-baby 8 years
duuuuuuuude. i hope i've already experienced mine. i'm 20 years old and recently got out of a 5+ year relationship (hahaha, i knowwww). it definitely has changed my perspective on a number of things, but left me feeling sort of inadequate in other areas of my life such as my education & future career. come to think of it, i'm still trying to find myself... hmmm, well i hope it passes soon.
Jude-C Jude-C 8 years
I am so having one right now. I just turned 28, and my mind is always full of "where is my life going? How did I end up here?" kind of questions--as well as the inevitable disappointment of realizing I haven't achieved my (crazy ambitious) 21-year-old goals. But I think I'd call it less of a crisis than an adjustment--an adjustment away from the blind, blithe optimism of youthful adulthood, into a more realistic perception of matters. And I still have those wild goals, I just now realize it takes more time and effort to reach them than my 21-year-old self imagined. :)
Jude-C Jude-C 8 years
I am so having one right now. I just turned 28, and my mind is always full of "where is my life going? How did I end up here?" kind of questions--as well as the inevitable disappointment of realizing I haven't achieved my (crazy ambitious) 21-year-old goals. But I think I'd call it less of a crisis than an adjustment--an adjustment away from the blind, blithe optimism of youthful adulthood, into a more realistic perception of matters.And I still have those wild goals, I just now realize it takes more time and effort to reach them than my 21-year-old self imagined. :)
GlowingMoon GlowingMoon 8 years
I definitely went through one. Metaphorically, I was sitting in a first class flight heading where I didn't want to go. That was a BAD place to be, no matter how nice it looked on the outside. Needless to say, I got off that flight at the first stop. Nowadays, I am soooo much happier for it. I'm thriving.
GlowingMoon GlowingMoon 8 years
I definitely went through one. Metaphorically, I was sitting in a first class flight heading where I didn't want to go. That was a BAD place to be, no matter how nice it looked on the outside.Needless to say, I got off that flight at the first stop.Nowadays, I am soooo much happier for it. I'm thriving.
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