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Do You Compare Your Relationships to Your Friends'?

Do You Compare Your Relationships to Your Friends'?

Whitney and Erin are both smitten by the men in their life, and since their relationships began around the same time, I wasn't shocked to see Whitney comparing the two on last night's episode of The City. Erin and Duncan have already exchanged I love yous, but Jay still isn't comfortable putting the BF/GF label on his relationship with Whitney, and it's clearly starting to weigh on her. Of course we all progress at different paces, and we all have different bonds with our significant others, but tell me, do you ever compare your relationships to your friends'?

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Photo courtesy of MTV

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pippins_halfling pippins_halfling 7 years
I do! Sometimes in a negative way (like, I'm jealous that they're in relationships, and I'm not), but sometimes in a good way (I've learned various things I really don't want to do in my next relationship).
sprinkibrio sprinkibrio 7 years
I do, and I don't think there is anything wrong with it. I tend to move things too fast, so I ask my friends for advice on when "normal" people would do this or that. Plus it's very useful to learn from other's mistakes.
PiNkY-PiNk PiNkY-PiNk 7 years
we used to hang out with a couple that were in the same situation as we were in so I couldn't help but notice some similarities and differences.
macchiatolove macchiatolove 7 years
Well, I suppose I do in a negative way. When I was single, I'd analyze situations my friends experienced and think... how would I react? would I accept that? or would I be angry? my closest friends have almost all been dating their chosen partners for 3+ years, and I'm starting to think I'd be getting engaged if it were me, but they haven't yet. So... yes, I suppose I do in the sense that I think how I would be in their place. When I'm in a relationship, I'd compare it in the sense of - I'd kill my bf if he ever did that, or, I wish my boyfriend would do that. But the way things appear isn't always how they really are, so there's no point either pitying or envying anyone too much!
macchiatolove macchiatolove 7 years
Well, I suppose I do in a negative way. When I was single, I'd analyze situations my friends experienced and think... how would I react? would I accept that? or would I be angry?my closest friends have almost all been dating their chosen partners for 3+ years, and I'm starting to think I'd be getting engaged if it were me, but they haven't yet. So... yes, I suppose I do in the sense that I think how I would be in their place. When I'm in a relationship, I'd compare it in the sense of - I'd kill my bf if he ever did that, or, I wish my boyfriend would do that.But the way things appear isn't always how they really are, so there's no point either pitying or envying anyone too much!
mack2600 mack2600 7 years
yes i do, it seems like quite a few of my friends have dysfunctional relationships so when i watch say my best friend and her psycho boyfriend together it makes me appreciate my perpetual on-again off-again boyfriend more. i can't help but compare.
GScott86 GScott86 7 years
No. The only way I'd compare it is by example: Just because their's is like that doesn't mean that ours is jsut like it too. Many people go through that stuff, there's no reason why we shouldn't be mature enough to deal with it better than they do!
genesisrocks genesisrocks 7 years
try not to
genesisrocks genesisrocks 7 years
try not to
demure20 demure20 7 years
Nope, but the bf does. He acts on it too. Just cause something is allowed or works for another couple does not mean its justified in ours. So it has caused problems between him and I.
oliveoyle625 oliveoyle625 7 years
Sort of yeah from time to time, especially when they seem happier than you and your man, but on the whole, I try not to let it get the best of me because I am so happy with my own relationship and wouldn't trade it with anyone for anyone else. I love my bf!
KibzeeLovee KibzeeLovee 7 years
As tempting as it sometimes may be, it is never a good idea.
LoveSarah LoveSarah 7 years
Since all of my friends are either single or in "young" relationships, for lack of a better term (like only 3 months of dating or so...) it's hard to compare because my boyfriend and I have been together for over 3 years and live with each other. Maybe if we knew another couple in the same situation as us, I would. But, I wouldn't obsess about it. Everyone is different, and every relationship is different.
yadiet yadiet 7 years
I'm sorry but who would say "I love you" after one month of dating.. there is so much you must learn from that person still. Its true what Jay said. The three words are said to frequently. There is a difference between Love and Lust. And coming from Erin that has acknowledge the fact of having 3 boyfriends at the time. I believe Whitney and Jay relationship will eventually get there. and there is nothing wrong with taking things slow. and i would never compare my relationship to another.
yadiet yadiet 7 years
I'm sorry but who would say "I love you" after one month of dating.. there is so much you must learn from that person still. Its true what Jay said. The three words are said to frequently. There is a difference between Love and Lust. And coming from Erin that has acknowledge the fact of having 3 boyfriends at the time. I believe Whitney and Jay relationship will eventually get there. and there is nothing wrong with taking things slow. and i would never compare my relationship to another.
Myst Myst 7 years
nope never have and never will.
CYL CYL 7 years
Sometimes...normally when my relationship is going through a rough patch. But a lot of times and most of the time I just realize how lucky I am to be with my guy if I do compare. But normally I don't just because every relationship is different...
vmruby vmruby 7 years
No....I have a great relationship with my husband and I'm pefectly happy with the way things are. There's no reason for me to compare it with anyone elses.
cordata cordata 7 years
I think I just naturally compare myself to the people in my life. It's a bad habit and facebook makes it so much worse! Now that I've been in a relationship for awhile, it doesn't really bother me. When I was single, that was a totally different story
valancyjane valancyjane 7 years
Not in the way the post describes, but I do watch my friends' relationships to see if I can figure out what makes them work well together (or not). Everyone's relationship is different but there are lessons to be learned everywhere.
mondaymoos mondaymoos 7 years
I've always been pretty different than my friends relationship-wise. It took almost a year and a half for me and The Husband to exchange ILYs. It's just one of those things that takes me a long time to decide.
aimeeb aimeeb 7 years
Nah not really, my friend Amanda and I can better understand each other when it comes to our boyfriends because of how they are and how similar Amanda and I are. But as far as comparing not so much-I don't think anyone could truly understand another's relationship if you're not the one in it. Also a lot of my friends currently date, married and are engaged to certain types of men I would never date anyways...so what is there to compare?
aimeeb aimeeb 7 years
Nah not really, my friend Amanda and I can better understand each other when it comes to our boyfriends because of how they are and how similar Amanda and I are. But as far as comparing not so much-I don't think anyone could truly understand another's relationship if you're not the one in it. Also a lot of my friends currently date, married and are engaged to certain types of men I would never date anyways...so what is there to compare?
princess_eab princess_eab 7 years
When I was in a bad relationship I noticed how all our couple friends were much more affectionate and loving than we were... should've clued me in!
skigurl skigurl 7 years
not obsessively like missyd says but yes for sure...it's only natural, especially if they started around the same time and if you spend lots of time together thankfully i'm the one being able to say "but my boyfriend..." in a good way!
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