Back in the day, you could still pretend you weren't home by turning your answering machine on. The folks who created this ad understood that you might not want to stress over taping your own greeting, though. Enter "Crazy Calls," pre-recorded machine jingles conveniently available on a cassette tape(!) With lyrics like "Nobody's Home!" to Beethoven's 5th, and "Call Me If You Can-Can," your friends and family would probably look forward to calling and not reaching you. George Constanza knows what I'm talking about.