We usually ask you to guess whether certain headlines are real or fake, but we'll let the cat out of the bag and assure you that these are all real — we've got the newspaper clippings to prove it! Whether the following headlines mean what they say or don't say what they mean, they're all pretty darn hilarious. The headline featured above is fine, but the quoted statement below it is just too good to pass up. In the mood for more funny newspaper clippings? Click here.