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Gift-Giving Guidelines For Relationships

"Am I Wrong to Refuse a Christmas Gift From My Boyfriend?"

This question is from a Group Therapy post in our TrèsSugar Community. Add your advice in the comments!

My boyfriend insists on buying me a Christmas gift. I don't want one, because I recently lost my job and can't afford to buy him a gift, so if he bought me one, I'd feel worse and not better. We are in the same field, so there's that element of competition, too. Plus, since I lost my job, he has been financially supporting me and I feel like that's enough. A gift is totally unnecessary. I told him I would rather him commit to doing something that would make me happy, like remember dates in his calendar or help me plan our social schedules.

Pride aside, at the crux of it, receiving a gift from him would not make me happy, yet he insists on giving me one because he wants to give me a gift. Isn't the point of Christmas to do or give something that you know will make the other person happy? In my opinion, he wants to buy me a gift to make himself happy for having given me something. So really, it would be more for him than for me. I realize that you could say the same thing about me — that I should just accept the gift because it'll make him happy. But as happy as it would make him, it would make me even more unhappy and uncomfortable. What do you think? Am I wrong about my gift-giving theory?

Have a dilemma of your own? Post it anonymously in Group Therapy for advice and check out what else is happening in the TrèsSugar Community.

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