Skip Nav
Valentine's Day
To All the Single Women Spending Valentine's Day Alone
Online Dating
20 Times Tumblr Totally Nailed What Dating Is Really Like
Relationships
Kaitlyn Bristowe and Shawn Booth Have Some Excellent Dating Advice For You

Have You Ever Gone to Therapy With a Significant Other?

I suggest therapy all the time on DearSugar for those in need of a listening ear, and therapy was brought up yet again on last night's episode of The Hills. Clearly Heidi and Spencer have some things to work out if they want to make their relationship work, and it's probably no surprise to you that I think couples counseling would do wonders for them! Taking that step and admitting you need help isn't easy but I'm curious to know if any of you have actually done it before. Whether your dating or married, tell me, have you ever gone to therapy with your significant other?

Photo courtesy of MTV

Around The Web
Laguna Beach and The Hills: Where Are They Now?
The Hills and Laguna Beach Cast Fashion
What Does Joe Millionaire Look Like Now?
Harry Potter Fan Art
Kaitlyn Bristowe and Shawn Booth Interview
The Hills and Laguna Beach GIFs
Signs He's a Gentleman

POPSUGAR, the #1 independent media and technology company for women. Where more than 75 million women go for original, inspirational content that feeds their passions and interests.

Join The Conversation
Allytta Allytta 6 years
no, if you need therapy you need to break up.
c4rolin3 c4rolin3 6 years
Marriage counselling is definitely an 'American' phenomenon. I'm not sure that it's something that happens as much in England. Maybe it's something to do with the fact that people in England have closer relationships with their GP doctor and they seem to act as many things- counsellor being one of them. I think it's a positive thing especially sometimes to get a third opinion from a professional rather than a family member of friend whose opinions it would be easy to dismiss as meddling, nosey or a personal attack. However, in reference to Heidi and Spencer- I'm watching the episodes at the moment of the beginning of this relationship and there are a number of things which dumbfound me: 1. why was she attracted to him in the first place 2. why did she go on a date with him 3. why did she start going out with him 4. why hasn't she broke up with him on the countless occasions he's given her more than reason enough 5. why did she move in with him 6. why on earth did she marry him 7. why didn't they get an annulment 8. how are they still together 9. why haven't they got divorced yet .... absolute joke of a relationship!
c4rolin3 c4rolin3 6 years
Marriage counselling is definitely an 'American' phenomenon. I'm not sure that it's something that happens as much in England. Maybe it's something to do with the fact that people in England have closer relationships with their GP doctor and they seem to act as many things- counsellor being one of them. I think it's a positive thing especially sometimes to get a third opinion from a professional rather than a family member of friend whose opinions it would be easy to dismiss as meddling, nosey or a personal attack.However, in reference to Heidi and Spencer- I'm watching the episodes at the moment of the beginning of this relationship and there are a number of things which dumbfound me:1. why was she attracted to him in the first place2. why did she go on a date with him3. why did she start going out with him4. why hasn't she broke up with him on the countless occasions he's given her more than reason enough5. why did she move in with him6. why on earth did she marry him7. why didn't they get an annulment8. how are they still together9. why haven't they got divorced yet.... absolute joke of a relationship!
tlsgirl tlsgirl 6 years
Nope. It's not to say that I wouldn't - I'm sure it could be helpful in the same ways that individual therapy is helpful.
superjules superjules 6 years
Yes, and while it might help two people who both want the relationship to work, if one of the people isn't willing to participate it won't help at all.
Hiding55 Hiding55 6 years
Way to go Kimpossible. I love to hear that people are making an honest effort to improve things. Glad to hear it's working and best of luck to you.
Kimpossible Kimpossible 6 years
We're in counseling now. We've been going through a blah phase and thought a 3rd party would be helpful. So far so good. We also had the required (by the church) pre-cana sessions (14 years ago). It's not always one or the other. sometimes people change, sometimes things happen, and sometimes things just get stale and some people do better with an unbiased 3rd party to help sort things out.
Kimpossible Kimpossible 6 years
We're in counseling now. We've been going through a blah phase and thought a 3rd party would be helpful. So far so good.We also had the required (by the church) pre-cana sessions (14 years ago). It's not always one or the other. sometimes people change, sometimes things happen, and sometimes things just get stale and some people do better with an unbiased 3rd party to help sort things out.
a-million-suns a-million-suns 6 years
Yes, and it really helped us work through a rough patch.
Spectra Spectra 6 years
Yes, and it was a disaster because my husband hates therapists. We were seeing a therapist to deal with some issues we were going through and the therapist asked my husband some questions about his bi-polar tendencies and my husband basically blew up at the guy and we got kicked out and my therapist told me I'd have to find a different therapist so he wouldn't feel "threatened" by my husband. I did end up going to a new therapist, but now I don't bring my husband along...I just end up talking to him directly about any issues I'm having with him and things end up working out a lot better.
Spectra Spectra 6 years
Yes, and it was a disaster because my husband hates therapists. We were seeing a therapist to deal with some issues we were going through and the therapist asked my husband some questions about his bi-polar tendencies and my husband basically blew up at the guy and we got kicked out and my therapist told me I'd have to find a different therapist so he wouldn't feel "threatened" by my husband. I did end up going to a new therapist, but now I don't bring my husband along...I just end up talking to him directly about any issues I'm having with him and things end up working out a lot better.
leslievanhouten leslievanhouten 6 years
pre marriage counseling = preventative carepost marriage counseling = relationship surgeryI know my choice
leslievanhouten leslievanhouten 6 years
pre marriage counseling = preventative care post marriage counseling = relationship surgery I know my choice
Deidre Deidre 6 years
We haven't gone to a therapist for couples counseling, but we have gone through the pre-marital sessions through our church during our engagement. It's definitely a good way to understand and clarify your relationship expectations with one another. I definitely would try to opt for counseling first if we end up having problems sometime down the line...anything we can try to work it out without heading towards a breakup. We're in this for life; let's do it right!
sprinkibrio sprinkibrio 6 years
I think pre-marriage counseling is a great idea. Churches have that kind of thing built in, but if you're not religious it's great to get it some other way. Like zabrow said... if there are a bunch of problems and you're not married it's time to break up and go to individual counseling.
sprinkibrio sprinkibrio 6 years
I think pre-marriage counseling is a great idea. Churches have that kind of thing built in, but if you're not religious it's great to get it some other way. Like zabrow said... if there are a bunch of problems and you're not married it's time to break up and go to individual counseling.
zabrow zabrow 6 years
just my opinion, BUT i think couples counseling is a great resource if you're married, but why waste your time if you're not? just break up if your problems are big enough to require counseling.
bbkf bbkf 6 years
I haven't and I doubt I would. My husband and I communicate very well, and we'd rather work things out on our own.
Sun_Sun Sun_Sun 6 years
no ....but should we find ourselves facing an obstacle we're having trouble overcoming, we're both definitely open to seeing a marriage counsellor.
MrsRachel MrsRachel 6 years
No. We did our required pre-marriage prep, some might consider it counseling. I would be interested in it if one of us thought that it would be beneficial.
beautifulmel beautifulmel 6 years
Haven't had to yet, but I am certainly open to it, if things ever got to a point where we couldn't work them out between ourselves.I've had counseling for myself for many years to get over abusive parenting I received as a child, and I know how much it can help to talk to an unbiased 3rd party. It just frees the mind from worry and allows for creative problem solving.
beautifulmel beautifulmel 6 years
Haven't had to yet, but I am certainly open to it, if things ever got to a point where we couldn't work them out between ourselves. I've had counseling for myself for many years to get over abusive parenting I received as a child, and I know how much it can help to talk to an unbiased 3rd party. It just frees the mind from worry and allows for creative problem solving.
Mod2 Mod2 6 years
I went to couple's counseling with my ex. We weren't necessarily having big problems, it just felt as though I wasn't doing a very good job of getting my point across in conversations. It really helped me to see him and my part in the relationship a lot more clearly. We broke up about a year after we had counseling, but I wouldn't say therapy was the kiss of death. (The way some people seem to think of this step in relationships.) In fact, I think going through it made us stronger as a couple. In the end, he just wasn't the right one... I would definitely do it again and hope to before getting married. It is a smart way to make sure both parties know what the other expects.
Mod2 Mod2 6 years
I went to couple's counseling with my ex. We weren't necessarily having big problems, it just felt as though I wasn't doing a very good job of getting my point across in conversations. It really helped me to see him and my part in the relationship a lot more clearly. We broke up about a year after we had counseling, but I wouldn't say therapy was the kiss of death. (The way some people seem to think of this step in relationships.) In fact, I think going through it made us stronger as a couple. In the end, he just wasn't the right one... I would definitely do it again and hope to before getting married. It is a smart way to make sure both parties know what the other expects.
sparklestar sparklestar 6 years
No, definitely not. We work our issues out between us first.
Latest Love
X