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The How-To Lounge: Going Out With a Group

Enjoying a night or weekend with a group is almost always a strange mix of fun and frustration. As exciting as a good group dynamic might be, it can also be difficult to manage. If everyone starts tugging in different directions, it’s not uncommon for tension to build. If you encounter your share of group outings, read my ideas for making them a bit easier and


  • It helps to know ahead of time what you’re dealing with. It is a group of five? 10? 20? It’s much easier to deal with a large group when your mind is in the right place.
  • If there’s a meal involved, make sure to bring cash so you won't have issue when it comes to splitting the tab — you don’t want to be stuck throwing down your card and paying twice as much as everyone else. In fact, it’s an even better idea to ask for your portion to be on a separate tab right when you sit down.
  • Get ready to go with the flow. Mingling with a group is a more pleasant experience if you don’t try to lead the pack. Instead, try being as adaptable as possible.
  • Don’t feel like you have to do something you really don’t want to do. Though being easygoing is important in a group setting, you’re still an individual. Don’t let your needs or concerns be stepped on.
  • Finally, act the way you want the rest of the group to be. If you want it to be a high-energy night, then you have to project that attitude. Whereas if you want it to be mellow, then reflect that in your conversation and actions. One person can really affect the mood of the entire group.


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