Skip Nav
Romantic Comedies
8 New Romances on Netflix in February
Books
23 Books You Should Read This Winter
Valentine's Day
20 Sexy Gifts For Your Significant Other

How Can I Make Single Friends?

"How Do I Make Single Friends?"

This question is from a Group Therapy post in our TrèsSugar Community. Add your advice in the comments!

So, I'm at a place in my life where almost all of my friends are married. (To be honest, I'm a little sad I'm not there yet, but I've had some great life experiences, taken some risks, and I'm proud of my accomplishments.)

Anyways, my main question is how to make more friends — single ones, I guess. I love my friends dearly, but the fact is, once people get married it's hard to hang out as much. I make plans with them in advance, but sometimes I want to do more spontaneous things, too — I love learning and trying new things.

This is maybe a bit sad to say, but as an introvert I've never been good at planning a social life, so to speak. I work hard, and I do enjoy/need quiet time on my own . . . just not all the time. I have started a few hobbies, for my own enjoyment and to meet people, but I have to watch myself or I'll still just be acting introverted around new people, which doesn't accomplish my goal.

I've heard people on this site mention websites like meetup.com. Are there any other such sites? And is it a safe way to meet people? Any other tips?

Have a dilemma of your own? Post it anonymously to Group Therapy for advice, and check out what else is happening in the TrèsSugar Community.

Image Source: Thinkstock
Around The Web
Things You Should Do in Your 30s
Dating an Aries Woman
How to Tell If He's Serious About You
Romance Challenge

POPSUGAR, the #1 independent media and technology company for women. Where more than 75 million women go for original, inspirational content that feeds their passions and interests.

Join The Conversation
sharky89 sharky89 3 years
I joined a couple of meetup groups as well.  Through them, I heard about a nonprofit organization whose cause I really liked.  Now I'm a volunteer with the nonprofit and have met some absolutely wonderful people.  It might be worth looking into joining websites for volunteering and becoming more involved in the community by volunteering. 
luthien-tinuviel luthien-tinuviel 3 years
Thanks for all your feedback. I really shouldn't "give up" on my current friends, and I don't mean to--it just gets tricky when they have kids and need a sitter or need to plan things in advance with their husbands. So yeah, I should try to be more proactive and open with my friends. Also glad to hear meetup is safe and people have had good experiences with it. I like your ideas, too, Bubbles12. Thanks everyone! Sometimes it gets tricky when you're out of college and most of your friends are at a different place in their life--it's hard not to feel a bit left out sometimes, but you've had some good suggestions.
vanilla-and-pink vanilla-and-pink 3 years
I moved away for work about seven years ago and I didn't know anyone.   I went to Salsa classes, dances and practices.  I took work related courses in the evenings.  I've joined mountain biking groups.  I built strong relationships at work.  I went to meet-up groups (www.meetup.com).   Basically, I did whatever I could to get myself out of the house.  Sometimes it can be hard to go to a group event alone, but once I was out of the house I was always happy.   The people who attend these kinds of activities are often in the same position as you.  Now I have the most terrific group of friends and I've some of the best memories of my life.  
SparksStar SparksStar 3 years
You might also check to see if there are any social sport leagues in your area.   
SparksStar SparksStar 3 years
I would encourage you to check out the meetup groups in your area. Join a couple groups that look interesting and just check them out at least once. If you have questions always feel free to ask the organizers about their group.   I was in the same boat as you several years ago and decided to put myself out there and try it. Although I'm a member of 4 groups I only really do stuff with one of them. I have met a lot of great friends thru my group. I also now an organizer for my group.  
SparksStar SparksStar 3 years
I would encourage you to check out the meetup groups in your area. Join a couple groups that look interesting and just check them out at least once. If you have questions always feel free to as the organizers about their group.   I was in the same boat as you several years ago and decided to put myself out there and try it. Although I'm a member of 4 groups I only really do stuff with one of them. I have met a lot of great friends thru my group. I also now an organizer for my group.
missmaryb missmaryb 3 years
I've actually thought about joining meetup because they have groups for things I am interested in doing (like white water rafting, biking, walking, etc) and I don't have friends who would do those things with me. I've never heard anything negative about meetup. I think you're on the right track, keep joining things and volunteering, and putting yourself out there. You will do just fine. Good luck!
BiWife BiWife 3 years
you can still try new things if you have to plan them. I don't understand why needing to be planned ahead means you can't do things with your current friends. Most 'singles groups' have the aim of helping people hook up, not making friends and staying single. So, I'd frankly stay away from any groups claiming to be specifically for 'singles'. Just because someone is married doesn't mean they can't have fun or experience new things. Give your current friends a second chance, let them know how you feel and ask them to either help you plan more stuff to do or find out in what ways they can still be spontaneous. Also, if you're having trouble finding single people in your current circles, don't spend more time in those circles - branch out & try something new/different.
pax4pax pax4pax 3 years
Wish you well. In overcoming shyness, just ask someone what's going on that's of interest to them and let them talk. They'll love you for listening.
luthien-tinuviel luthien-tinuviel 3 years
Thanks for the comment, pax4pax. I do belong to a church; I suppose I should get more involved in some of the activities there.
pax4pax pax4pax 3 years
Meetup is good and safe. You can even start your own group on your own subject for minimal cost. You should join a social organization, like a church, where part of the point is to develop a community. Sharing life with others can create bonds and deeper relationships.
Latest Love
X