My ex and I broke up two months ago. I've tried to get back together with him but he refuses, saying that he doesn't love me anymore. It hurts so much, but every time I feel like I'm close to moving on, he randomly texts me and gets my hopes up. I still love him, but I'm too exhausted to handle the way he keeps popping back into my life. I told him to never text me again, but it's been a few days and I just feel terrible. I feel betrayed, I'm broken, and I've been doing all that I can to get over this but the feeling won't go away.
I've tried to pick up a new hobby, I've hung out with other people, met new guys, and nothing will change. If anything, those things just depress me even more than before. I still love him and I'd do anything for him. I don't understand how he could date me for so long, even discuss marriage with me, and then just end it all like I was nothing.
I said some stupid, hurtful things after we broke up, and even though I apologized and tried to be civil about it, he's still holding a grudge. He won't even acknowledge the fact that he hurt me even more with his words and actions. How do I get over this? I already deleted his number and don't intend on communicating again. What else am I supposed to do?