All right, so I'm getting kind of desperate here, and I'm beginning to wonder if there's any hope. He and I have been close friends for about three years, almost four. We've been intimate with each other since November — after he took a train six hours away just to come see me (and surprise me) in the musical I was performing in — but not very actively as we are both college students attending separate colleges.
He knows I am in love with him. After we had sex the first time (it was my first time ever) he told me that he "didn't regret it, but he felt bad about it." I told him that I loved him after that because I didn't think it was fair of me to not tell him. I ended the conversation before he could say anything to me about it. Things were stale and slow for a while due to the distance, so on his birthday I surprised him with a pair of sexy panties, which steamed things right back up again! We have had sex a few times since that first time in January, to HIS initiation, but not very much.
I don't really know where we stand relationship wise, and I want to ask, but at the same time I would prefer him to talk to me about it.
But basically, he rarely calls me, texts me first, or initiates plans with me. He never really has, to be honest, that isn't really how he is. But what I'm wondering here is if it's possible to make him start pursuing and chasing me instead of it going the other way around as it has been, if we're past the point of no return here, or what not. I do understand and accept that he and I will both probably date other people casually before we date each other, as he is still trying to figure out his major and what he wants to do with his life, while I already know. I'm just not really sure what next step I should take here.
Please let me know what you think!