I watched this intro to the short-lived MC Hammer-inspired superhero cartoon Hammerman (1991 - 1992) like three times just to figure out what the freaking story was. So here goes: Some old dude had superpowers thanks to some special shoes that can talk. He has to retire so he and his granddaughter go out looking for his replacement. (Are you still with me?) They find him, and his name is Stanley. The shoes like Stanley, so he becomes the crime-fighting superhero. (Huh?) With an intro like this, no wonder the show only lasted thirteen episodes! (Thanks, eBaum's World!)
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