"She's definitely dating a bunch of guys, but she's too young. She's not going to get married until 28, and she'll have her first kid at 30 or 32, the second one at 35. I've got it all planned."
Is it any wonder that her daughter has turned dating into her life's work? It's either that or never marry out of misplaced revenge. All moms want things for their daughters, and I'm sure lots have would-be-nice plans — they're just not this fleshed out. Hopefully.