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Moving On From a Breakup

Group Therapy: Help With Moving On From "the One"

This question is from a Group Therapy post in our TrèsSugar Community. Add your advice in the comments!

So I met this guy and fell in love with him. Harder and deeper than I had before with anyone. He also told me that he had never felt this way before about a girl and how much happier he had become since I came into his life. We connected on a level in which I had never experienced. We have just about everything in common and we just clicked super fast with one another. We've known each other for 8 months, which I know isn't a long time, but love knows no time, isn't that a saying? Anyways I really and truly felt and still feel that he was my soulmate. That one guy I had been looking for my whole life. And I couldn't be happier. We spent all day everyday texting, and he'd call me every night he got off of work and as soon as we hung up he'd text me again. It was amazing . . . to think that a person cared about me that much that they'd never wanna go without me in their life in one way or another. We did not live in the same state so really communication by phone was all we had for the first few months of talking and us dating.

I finally got to go see him in person about 3 months ago. That moment — where I seen him and hugged him for the first time — was like magic. I'll remember that forever, whether I want to or not. And unfortunately I don't. He ended up breaking up with me a few days after I went back home. He told me he just wasn't feeling it while I was there . . . that there just wasn't a "wow" factor.

For the rest of the dilemma, keep reading!

We still keep in contact and he flirts sometimes, says that he wants to be with me and then flips a switch and says he doesn't see it happening or that having a gf is not what he wants. I asked him three times already if we could work things out . . . this is how much he means to me. Last night was the last time. He told me he just doesn't think that it would work because I live here and he lives there and how he wouldn't want me to move there or move in with him cause he feels like I would become his responsibility and that's something he doesn't want.

I need to know how I can stop feeling how I do about him. I have no idea how to move on. It's hard because I want to move on, but then at the same time I don't because I still feel like he's just confused by how he's feeling right now and he might come around to wanting to be with me again. And I only say this because of how he interacts with me. He even says he wants me to come visit him soon. But I don't know if he's just playing games or what. I'm beyond confused and I am honestly tired of trying to figure out his mixed signals, so I decided to just stop. I want him in my life, I do, but I don't know if it's possible for me to just be friends with him.

I know I can't be the only one who has gone through this so if anyone can give me any advice or let me know what they did to get over that one guy their heart beats for I would really really appreciate it.

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