It wasn't even an actual romantic relationship, as it was entirely Internet-based, but I had allowed myself to be swept away with everything, and I feel like a total idiot looking back on it. I was way too naive, but not really delusional as he laid it on thick. He was the one insisting that he was going to come be with me, sending me roses on Valentine's Day, etc. Basically it was a year and a half of empty promises on his part and me foolishly believing them, until 8 months ago when he said he was "getting rid of me."
I found out later he had been seeing someone for a couple of months and never had the balls to be honest with me about it. I've never had any other significant relationship with a man, but I still feel very shaken by the whole experience and can't seem to move on for good. At several points I've thought that I was beyond everything, but then I go right back to dwelling on the whole situation, and constantly thinking about him.
I feel like at this point I should be well and truly past it, even though I know that it was the closest thing to "first love" that I've experienced so far, and I am admittedly a very sensitive person. Is this normal when a relationship ends? I'm frustrated as hell.