I met an amazing guy almost immediately after a break up. I had just gotten out of a 3 1/2 year relationship and wasn't emotionally ready to start something right away, but at the same time he's too good to let go.
It's been five months and I am finally starting to see a future with him. But ... I don't know if I am ready to be a girlfriend again. I still think that I want more time to focus on myself, yet I don't want to let him go.
How can I keep him interested and grow closer to him while managing to keep enough distance between us so I feel independent? Conflicted Carys
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Dear Conflicted Carys
Nice work - you've got yourself a keeper. He's been patient with you through your many breakdowns post break-up and has still stuck by your side. He must really like you. I am sure he sees that your traffic light is yellow: and that he's proceeding with caution.
Now it's time for you to throw him a bone. You need to make a choice. Are you ready for love again or not? You can't keep stringing him along; it's not fair to either one of you. Plus, how passionate can you actually be if something is holding you back from taking things to the next level?
If time is what you need, then take it and be alone until you can see what you're missing. Timing is everything and unfortunately, you can't help that you met him when you did.
Taking a break may be just the clarity that you are seeking. Just realize, that you are risking that Mr. Right might take flight and become someone else's Prince Charming. I believe that everything happens the way they do for a reason; have faith and listen to your gut instincts for guidance.