Two years ago I lived with three other girls, we were all really good friends and then things turned sour. The way they see it is that I was responsible for all the problems that happened, and everything was blamed on me.
l left with things somewhat resolved and moved away for a year. Now I'm back and living with a mutual friend of the group. I love these girls and want to be able to be close with them, but at the same time I don't want to put myself in a negative situation again.
By moving away I found out so much more about myself and want to be able to implement that into my daily life. How can I get over the past and move on to start a new future? Concerned Cornelia
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Dear Concerned Cornelia
Have an open and honest discussion with your girlfriends. Don't forget there are three sides to every story: a) yours, b) theirs, and c) the truth.
Think about what you've done to offend them and apologize for it. Then think about what they've done to hurt you and ask them if their intentions were malicious. Listen carefully to what they say. Maybe you've changed, but if they haven't then you will wind up back at square one again.
Explain that your year away has given you great perspective and it's also shown you how deeply you care for them. Tell them that you've missed them and that more than anything you'd like to be friends again. Having a grown up conversation (limit the blaming) can really get you far. Hopefully you gal pals can hug it out and make a fresh start.
Hey, if this winds up working out, can you call the folks over at HBO and try to arrange a Sex And The City Reunion?