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Is It OK To Remain Friends With My Ex's Mom?

Is It OK To Remain Friends With My Ex's Mom?

Dear Sugar
I have known my ex boyfriend since childhood and have always been very close with his family. To be honest, his mom and I have a really tight bond, and it is what lead me to dating her son. My boyfriend and I have since moved on, but I have continued to remain in contact with his mother because of our pre-existing relationship. As far as I know, he doesn't mind at all that we are still friends.

However, my current boyfriend of three years has become accustomed to our kinship but he thinks it's kind-of weird. Since I don't have a good relationship with his mom, I think that maybe he gets jealous whenever she and I talk on the phone. I don't ever speak to my ex, and so I don't really feel that I should have to remove his mother from my life. Do you think this kind of behavior is OK? Torn Theresa

To see DEARSUGAR's answer

Dear Torn Theresa
Hmmm. I'm sorry that your boyfriend is putting you in this position. Don't you wish that you could all just be friends? Even the beautiful Gisele Bunchen remains close with her longtime ex boyfriend's mom Irmelin DiCaprio.

Is your current boyfriend upset because you have a connection to your ex boyfriend or is he jealous that you are not as close with his mother? Have you tried to establish a relationship with her? Has he ever actually come out and asked you to put a halt on this friendship?

The bottom line is that this isn't worth fighting about with your boyfriend. If your bond with your ex's mom is putting a strain on your relationship, I think it is best to lay low. For the couple of great conversations that you might have throughout the year, is it really worth making him feel icky?

Try explaining what it is about this friendship that is so special to you. If he still doesn't feel comfortable, you are ultimately going to have to decide which relationship is more important to you. Hopefully you can find a middle ground so no one gets hurt.

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