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Online Dating Red Flags

Terrifying Tales of Online Dating

A girlfriend of mine shared with me one of the worst online dating experiences I've ever heard. After chatting with the guy for two weeks online and over the phone, things started to smell fishy close to their planned first date (which she ran out of before it even began). She has allowed me to share her nightmarish story in hopes that you will learn from her mistakes, the biggest of which was missing the warning signs prior to meeting. So, straight from her lips, here are eight online dating red flags to look out for before the first date.

  1. Job white lies: The night before their first date the guy asked my friend to be Facebook friends, and something didn't quite match up when it came to where he worked. "He talked about how how he is financially secure and loves his job, and the first status I see, I am not kidding, is 'It's Fourth of July . . . no job and I have $37 to my name . . . what should I do?'"
  2. Outdated photos: She also realizes his online dating photos weren't what they seemed. "He tells me about how he only puts recent pics up because he doesn't ever want to feel like he is sending the wrong message out to people. I look at his pictures and the 'recent pics' on the dating site were from 2006, the first FB photos he put up."
  3. Suspicious photos: Also on Facebook: "His pictures only showed half his face . . . every pic. Like, Phantom of Opera status!"
  4. Cheap date: There's a difference between financially savvy and just plain rude. "We were trying to plan where we want to meet up and he's like, 'I have like $12 to free movie tickets I won at a picnic like four years ago . . . might as well use those.'"
  5. Passing on alcohol: I don't know which would be worse: drinking too much on the first date, or not drinking at all so you can "save up" for the weekend. "I was like, 'I was thinking of meeting up for a margarita or coffee?' and he's like, 'Well, I don't drink coffee . . . and I am planning on drinking a lot this weekend . . . so I'll just get juice or something.'"
  6. Sketchy past experiences: If his past dating stories make you cringe, you probably should stay away. "He was telling me about how the dating site had been for him in the past, and he was like, 'The past couple dates I had I took the girls to Applebee's, and they totally wanted to have sex with me. It was weird, like I'm not a prude, but girls need to calm down. They were major skankopotimisses!'"
  7. Derogatory jokes: "Then I am scrolling down his wall, and I see comments from friends about fat girls, like really horrible mean things. And he was like, 'Oh I can explain that, it's a pretty long story. One time my buddies and I were hanging out, and this fat girl came and asked me for my number, and all my friends made fun of me. That's the basic gist of it.'"
  8. Crappy car: "So we meet for coffee, and I hear this old, old, old, old, old Impala clunking down the road, smoking under the hood, and it's HIM, and the car stalls in the middle of the street! I literally ran away. I didn't even wait to talk to him!"

The moral of the story? Facebook friend each other ASAP. Do you have an online dating horror story? Share it in the comments!

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RoaringSilence RoaringSilence 2 years
OMG 6 and 7 are so bad. That explanation for 7 made the situation even worse. And 6... even if those girls wanted the guy (which I doubt), I would not date someone who uses the term skankapotamus. Come back when you've grown up and stopped slut shaming.
strangehunny strangehunny 4 years
That car may not be his but a loaner. I dated an extremely wealthy guy that drove a clunker all the time while his 15 collector cars sat pristine in his private garage. He always took me in one of his nice cars but if we were meeting somewhere he drove his clunker. Things may not be as they seem on the outside. The other notes....totally agree.
strangehunny strangehunny 4 years
That car may not be his but a loaner. I dated an extremely wealthy guy that drove a clunker all the time while his 15 collector cars sat pristine in his private garage. He always took me in one of his nice cars but if we were meeting somewhere he drove his clunker. Things may not be as they seem on the outside. The other notes....totally agree.
ashleyheatherr ashleyheatherr 5 years
I would run away from the car too shreerose!
shreerose shreerose 5 years
Guess I'm the only one that would run away from the car. No thank you! I also agree with the rest of the list.
shreerose shreerose 5 years
Guess I'm the only one that would run away from the car. No thank you! I also agree with the rest of the list.
Bettye-Wayne Bettye-Wayne 5 years
Very true Amber!
Bettye-Wayne Bettye-Wayne 5 years
Very true Amber!
amber512 amber512 5 years
Yeah, the car thing would be sort of snobby if it were the only thing. But it definitely sounds like the straw that broke the camel's back!
Bettye-Wayne Bettye-Wayne 5 years
Agreed blackwood, my well-loved car is (to put it nicely) 7 years away from being a classic. I would hate to have some guy reject me over some squeaky ball joints and a couple rust spots. The rest is dead-on though.
Blackwood Blackwood 5 years
The last one about the car seems a little too superficial... can't a nice, decent man just have a crappy car? I don't particularly think it's a symptom of worse things to come down the road... I agree with the rest of the list, though. It's definitely great if all those things come out on a first date, so you know not to get invested... I'd be disappointed and disgusted if I ever got too attached with a guy that turns out to be a major liar or a fat/gay/immigrant/etc. hater.
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