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Overhearing Sex

I Hear My Roommate Having Sex

This post comes from the Awkward! group in our TrèsSugar Community. If you have any advice, please add it in the comments!


Every Sunday morning, I wake up to the sound of my roommate's bed creaking. Not to mention the like three or four other times I hear them each week. Her bedroom is right above mine, so it's not like they are being crazy loud, but I don't know how to broach the subject.

Do I just have to live with it?


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Source: Flickr User Orin Zebest

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LaSigh LaSigh 5 years
@ Bella I asked a roommate to drown herself out with music once... Got stuck with Dave Matthews Band on full blast at 4AM and could still here the roommate screaming. I now hate Dave Matthews Band.
dikke-kus dikke-kus 5 years
Ear plugs? I-Pod? Leave your stereo on loud while they go on about it? Leave your TV on? I'm sure there's ways you could help solve the problem.
Venus1 Venus1 5 years
If she's not being loud I would suggest you let it go. It doesn't sound as if it's causing a problem with you sleeping. Accept she has needs and if you try and address this with her it could ruin her sex life.
bgorgeouss bgorgeouss 6 years
She's not really being loud, and she might not even realize that you hear her bed creak every time she has sex. If it really bothers you, rather than confronting her, maybe you could mention that you hear bed creak in a teasing/funny way. If she knows you hear her, then the ball will be in her court to attempt to make less noise, or put on more background music.
Advah Advah 6 years
Hah funny, maybe it's because I never had a roommate but I find those situations painfully awkward and would NOT have sex if I knew someone could hear us. Just find that too private, I guess.
Beauty Beauty 6 years
I have this issue as well. I haven't said anything, but if/when it happens again, I plan to ask if maybe they could turn on the music. I don't know. It's just incredibly awkward.
smurfle smurfle 6 years
ummm. live with it. just like she'll have to do when you're getting some
juicebox07 juicebox07 6 years
I agree with MissSushi. It would be different if you could hear loud moaning, but a little creaking? Get over it. I was at my boyfriend's house before and his sister was upstairs with her boyfriend. We knew they were doing the deed because her bed creaks too. We just giggled and said, "I wonder what they're doing?" It's really not that big of a deal.
MissSushi MissSushi 6 years
Sorry, but if all you hear is their bed creaking, they aren't doing anything wrong that you need to mention for them to change. Sex is a normal human function, and you can't expect them not to do it so you can avoid the knowledge that they do it. I don't agree that you should mention it. Why? What exactly are you going to gain from that? Your roomate feeling awkard about something normal? As long as they aren't moaning and groaning or blaring porn, it really is a basic right of theirs to quietly have sex in a closed room. Perhaps you should look into a studio apt type thing if you're uncomfortable knowing your roomates have sex.
bluebellknoll bluebellknoll 6 years
I had a roommate that had his bedroom above mine and sometimes I would turn off the tv in my room and hear his bed squeaking so...I'd turn the tv back on and sleep time it for 1/2 hr. No biggie.
dexaholic dexaholic 6 years
How about suggesting she get an area rug for under her bed? It might cushion the noise a little bit. Or get a can of WD-40 and fix the creaky bed :)And I don't see anything wrong in telling you can hear the bed creaking. It's not like she's letting out "porn howls" like cherryblossom has to deal with!
dexaholic dexaholic 6 years
How about suggesting she get an area rug for under her bed? It might cushion the noise a little bit. Or get a can of WD-40 and fix the creaky bed :) And I don't see anything wrong in telling you can hear the bed creaking. It's not like she's letting out "porn howls" like cherryblossom has to deal with!
mix-tape mix-tape 6 years
I lived in a situation like this 2 years ago. My friend and her boyfriend would shake the bed against the wall so that the loud banging would wake me up every night they did it. My neighbors (who I was also friends with) could hear it too! No one ever said anything to them, but I learned to tune them out by blasting my tv or stereo the duration of their action. I think eventually they understood the correlation between me blasting music and sex, it was a bit embarrassing, but I'm too passive to have just told them straight up.
cherryblossom cherryblossom 6 years
so if you think your friend would take it well, and if your feelings are similar to mine then go ahead and breach the topic gently, but if you are uncomfortable and think it might make things awkward then maybe the earplugs are your best bet
cherryblossom cherryblossom 6 years
Ok so I live in a house with my boyfriend, and his brother, and his brothers girlfriend, and i hear this all the time, except she is rude about it. Shes only young (19 ) and the noise only gets louder and louder when my bf and I come audibly within distance of their room. I think personally that she is trying to be cool in some way. im not a prude or anything, I just dont see why she should have to be letting out porn howls when she knows there are people within earshot, and i can sympathize with this persons pain. I wouldnt feel comfortable bringing up the subject because i dont want to let her know i noticed because im pretty sure thats what shes aiming for.
Victory2 Victory2 6 years
I think she might herself feel a little awkward for the noise she is causing but as the others said, short of stopping having sex there's nothing she might be able to do. my boyfriend's sister is visiting at the moment and sleeping in the room underneath his. it's the first time i've met her so it's a little weird that she can hear us. but again it's life...
LOVE-ANGELINA LOVE-ANGELINA 6 years
LOL um swtich rooms maybe, or just listen to lullabye that is love making, I mean its your roommate. Its the sorta thing you have to put up with, unless they are like breaking sh*t around the house and being crazy loud. The bed creaking from love making is something I am not sure they can prevent and she pays half the rent I assume so technically as long as she is in her space, making love, not breaking things, then I guess its just something you will have to deal with. It can't be that bad. Unless they are both really really unattractive and you have a bad mental picture in your head of what their love making looks like and the creaking bed adds a sound affect that doesn't help that disgusted feeling go away. If not don't let it worry you sweetie.
LOVE-ANGELINA LOVE-ANGELINA 6 years
LOL um swtich rooms maybe, or just listen to lullabye that is love making, I mean its your roommate. Its the sorta thing you have to put up with, unless they are like breaking sh*t around the house and being crazy loud. The bed creaking from love making is something I am not sure they can prevent and she pays half the rent I assume so technically as long as she is in her space, making love, not breaking things, then I guess its just something you will have to deal with. It can't be that bad. Unless they are both really really unattractive and you have a bad mental picture in your head of what their love making looks like and the creaking bed adds a sound affect that doesn't help that disgusted feeling go away. If not don't let it worry you sweetie.
skigurl skigurl 6 years
it's not really her fault if she's not being like stupid loud ... you could mention it and see if you could work it out, but it's her right to do it and unless she's being super rude i don't think you can put up a big fussalso, why is this so awkward? i don't get it...i'd think it were awkward if she were moaning and groaning or if you knew personal things they were doing, but just knowing she does the deed with her boyfriend or whoever isn't that big of a deal...if all you hear is creeking, put earplugs in and stop being such a prude
skigurl skigurl 6 years
it's not really her fault if she's not being like stupid loud ... you could mention it and see if you could work it out, but it's her right to do it and unless she's being super rude i don't think you can put up a big fuss also, why is this so awkward? i don't get it...i'd think it were awkward if she were moaning and groaning or if you knew personal things they were doing, but just knowing she does the deed with her boyfriend or whoever isn't that big of a deal...if all you hear is creeking, put earplugs in and stop being such a prude
eastcoastgirl eastcoastgirl 6 years
Awkward for sure! Tell her so you can work it out.Maybe switch rooms!
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