"Soothe yourself by yourself" is the tagline for this product. And by yourself you will be because everyone else will be too embarrassed to be near you. This "revolutionary head massager" doesn't just make you look like a nerd, oh, no! It applies what will feel like hundreds of fingers on your scalp, and is portable enough that you can wear it "while at your office desk, on the morning commute, or while enjoying your evening television program." Okay, maybe I'd wear it at home — with the shades drawn!