I know that staring is supposed to be rude, but what else am I supposed to do on my morning commute but look at cute guys, elegant women, and freakazoids? The freaks and women don't like it when I stare, but I don't think cute guys mind. The solution to this breach of etiquette? Either really dark sunglasses or these Don't Look at the Gorilla Glasses designed for visitors to the Rotterdam Zoo to put on in case a gorilla escapes. Cuz they don't like direct eye contact and will rip your head off if you look at them straight on.