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Say What? Talent Helped Dancing Judge Escape Abuse


"Abuse, it just survives and thrives in silence."

— Mary Murphy, a judge on So You Think You Can Dance, breaks her silence about the years of abuse she suffered decades ago at the hands of her then-husband.

Years into the marriage, Mary discovered her love for dance, which taught her that she could feel beautiful and talented, and she eventually left her abusive husband nine years into the marriage. Speaking on Larry King Live this week, Mary said even though she repressed the memories for years, she felt compelled to share her story publicly to help raise awareness for other victims.


Image Source: Getty
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Kimpossible Kimpossible 6 years
Oh her statement is so true. I'm so very grateful that I escaped my abusive first marriage. That was 15 years ago and it's just been in the last couple of years that I have finally achieved the self confidence I should have had all along. running it is complicated on so many levels. Thank you for being one who understands that. It is very frustrating to hear people berate those who are in abusive relationships to "just leave" or those who proclaim they "would never stay in an abusive relationship". You simply don't know what you will do unless you are in the situation. And by berating ones who are in an abusive relationship by saying such things as "why don't you just leave" you're only making it worse. Their self confidence is already shot to hell, and saying things like that only pushes them deeper into that pit of despair and depression and makes them feel even worse than they already do about themselves.
Kimpossible Kimpossible 6 years
Oh her statement is so true. I'm so very grateful that I escaped my abusive first marriage. That was 15 years ago and it's just been in the last couple of years that I have finally achieved the self confidence I should have had all along. running it is complicated on so many levels. Thank you for being one who understands that. It is very frustrating to hear people berate those who are in abusive relationships to "just leave" or those who proclaim they "would never stay in an abusive relationship". You simply don't know what you will do unless you are in the situation. And by berating ones who are in an abusive relationship by saying such things as "why don't you just leave" you're only making it worse. Their self confidence is already shot to hell, and saying things like that only pushes them deeper into that pit of despair and depression and makes them feel even worse than they already do about themselves.
runningesq runningesq 6 years
MissSushi, you are so right. I do domestic violence cases and while it's frustrating to see these women stay in abusive relationships, I've never once said "why don't you just LEAVE?" it's complicated on many levels.and good for Mary for breaking free --- and also for having the courage to talk about it. .. may help other victims.
runningesq runningesq 6 years
MissSushi, you are so right. I do domestic violence cases and while it's frustrating to see these women stay in abusive relationships, I've never once said "why don't you just LEAVE?" it's complicated on many levels. and good for Mary for breaking free --- and also for having the courage to talk about it. .. may help other victims.
MissSushi MissSushi 6 years
This makes sense... it was the confidence and happiness she gained, most likely slowly, within herself that allowed her to truly see and get out of her situation. It's a complicated game of control and power the abuser has over the victim, mentally and physically, people just have no clue. They think they should just leave, that it's so simple. I think its worth people looking into and educating themselves on.
MissSushi MissSushi 6 years
This makes sense... it was the confidence and happiness she gained, most likely slowly, within herself that allowed her to truly see and get out of her situation. It's a complicated game of control and power the abuser has over the victim, mentally and physically, people just have no clue. They think they should just leave, that it's so simple. I think its worth people looking into and educating themselves on.
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